Bridal 4-1-1 Workshops a Must for Brides!

If you or anyone else is planning a wedding, this is a must for making your planning process go more smoothly.


  Bridal 4-1-1 Workshops for the DIY Bride!

The Surprises to Crafting a Wedding Ceremony

My husband I both officiate for non-denominational weddings.  It is a true joy to be able craft a ceremony that has special meaning that comes from the depths of a couple's hearts filled with love.  It can reflect their personalities, idiosyncrasies, special moments in their courtship, their hope of building a beautiful future together and so much more.

One thing I can say is that, almost without fail is that when we first ask questions at the initial consultation, they will say something along the lines of "I guess we never thought of that!"  It can pertain to whether or not they want to repeat the vows to each other or just want to say "I do".  Sometimes it's when we bring up what the issue of what they would like us to wear.  We explain that we don't want to clash in the pictures, or appear overdressed or underdressed for the type of wedding they wish to have regardless of whether it is a themed wedding or not.

Here is the big surprise!  The one thing that seems to get the longest pause is when we ask them how they would like to be introduced after they are pronounced husband and wife. They usually look at each other with a puzzled or awkward glance.  Perhaps this is when reality hits them and the bride seems to feel like she has to make a final decision on whether she is keeping her name or not.  We will generally list a few options for introducing them as husband and wife to all of the guests at their wedding.

Just a few examples that might be added after stating, "It is my pleasure to introduce to you for the first time as husband and wife...

Mr. and Mrs. Michael Smith
Michael and Michelle Smith
Michael and Michelle
Michael Smith and Michelle Jones
Michael Smith and Michelle Jones-Smith

The best part is seeing the looks on their faces as I pronounce them as husband and wife.  It's that once in a lifetime moment that gets me every time!  What an honor and privilege it is to be able share this moment.  It brings a smile to my face every time, but then again, I'm smiling all the way to the wedding just thinking about the couple and being so happy for them!  No kidding!

Yes, I must say, I love officiating weddings!  I do, I do!

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!
www.greatestofdays.com

10 Questions for the DIY Bride

If you want to plan your wedding yourself, you can save yourself a lot of headache and stress by attending workshops that are put on by vendors.  I would equate it to the saying "an ounce of prevention is work a pound of cure".  You can never have too much information just as you can never be too prepared for any project that is going to require a lot of people, time and money!

What!?  A wedding being compared to project management?  Yes!  It's all in the details, and the unexpected, contingency plans and so forth!  People will tell you how to plan until they are blue in the face, but if it isn't working for you, then step back take a deep breath and allow yourself to devise a plan that is geared more to your style.

Ask yourself these questions:

1.  Am I a checklist kind of person?
2.  Am I a person who prefers to have everything categorized by color?
3.  Am I a person who has to have a committee for everything? (Your strength comes from being surrounded by people and their ideas).
4.  Am I person who can get a lot more done if I can just go someplace to concentrate where it is quiet?
5.  Am I planning my wedding to please everyone else, and is that causing more stress?
6.  Do I thrive in a high energy environment?
7.  Do I find it easier to learn by seeing things, hearing things, touching things, feeling things or even smelling things?
8.  Am I running like crazy but feeling like I'm getting nowhere fast?
9.  Am I juggling family, career and planning a wedding?
10.  Am I just finding everything too expensive and getting more discouraged by the minute?


If you can answer some of these questions, identify with some of them and feel a sense of relief, I have a tool that might help you get focused.

If you are a bride-to-be, you can go to my website http://greatestofdays.com/contact.html and put "planning" in the comment section and I'll email you a pdf of my "Visionnaire".  If you follow my blog, I will update you with tips to help you plan a stress-free wedding.

Planning Weddings with Less Stress and a Laugh or Two!: Help for Brides Who Never Expected That Planning a Wedding Would Be So Stressful!

Planning Weddings with Less Stress and a Laugh or Two!: Help for Brides Who Never Expected That Planning a Wedding Would Be So Stressful!

Help for Brides Who Never Expected That Planning a Wedding Would Be So Stressful!

If this is you, give yourself some credit.  You have just taken on a part-time job and possibly one of the more major projects you will plan in your lifetime.  You probably want everything to be perfect, but perfectionism can get in the way of everyone having a perfect time on your wedding day.  That might sound backwards!

If you find yourself saying, "I should do this or I have to do that, try re-phrasing it just a bit and see if you feel better.  Try instead saying to yourself, "It would be preferable if I did this or did that."  Don't be surprised if something doesn't seem quite as important or essential.  This might help you reassess what is truly important to you or if you are just following what you think is assumed of you.

If you have someone who is putting some pressure on you to do something that would only add more stress, try saying something like "I would prefer not to." This helps to put the gears in neutral long enough for you to catch your breath and show assertiveness without being rude.  It's merely stating a fact.

Another thing that will get you through many rough spots, is a sense of humor.  Will whatever is stressing you out be important 50 years from now?  Probably not.  One thing is certain, worst case scenario, you'll be saying for years something like, "It wasn't funny then, but we've laughed about it so many times since."  You might need something to contribute when people you meet in the future talk and laugh about their wedding "horror" stories.  The goal is to have things go as well as possible, but not let the little things ruin your day!  (Note-- with a Wedding Coordinator, you probably won't even know what went wrong, because we take care of it without it interrupting your day.)

I'll share some things about my own wedding that took place at my parents' home.  I couldn't convince them to remove one of the hanging lamps in the living room.  It was my uncle who traveled the farthest who stood up into the lamp when I was walking down the aisle.  I kept apologizing every time I could for years to where it became funny.  I also found out the day after our wedding that I had thrown my toss bouquet onto the roof.  I had wondered why no one was following us and didn't quite know what to think.  Didn't anyone care?  Everyone was busy trying to figure out how they were going to get the bouquet down from the roof!!  Embarrassing?  Not for long!  Funny memory for a long time?  Yes!  If you don't want anyone chasing you, throw your bouquet on the roof!

Also, the more relaxed you are, the easier it is going to be on those you love enough to have asked them to be in your wedding.  This is an adjustment period for everyone, so just relax and have a good time.  You still want to have everyone on friendly terms after the wedding.

Wishing you the greatest of days!


Janis Flagg


www.greatestofdays.com
http://www.facebook.com/greatestofdays
206-604-1908
jan@greatestofdays.com


We coordinate so you can celebrate!

Wedding Coordinators = Money Saved Planning Your Wedding!

As a Wedding Coordinator, I've found myself so many times saying that I wish I could have been in contact with a bride earlier.  Often this is when I've met a bride who wants me to do a Day-of-Coordination.  She has chosen all if not close to all of her vendors by this point in time.  There's a good chance that I could've gotten some discounts for a bride earlier in the game.  If I had a dollar for all the times that a mother of the bride or a bride herself has said, "If only we had known you sooner"!  I literally feel a grimace come over my face wishing the very same thing.  I hear about their heartaches and nightmares and I genuinely feel for them.

So many times brides will start planning their wedding with all the greatest of intentions and wonderful plans and end up facing roadblocks that a Wedding Coordinator might have been able to steer them from.  That could be just in letting them know that their favorite flower isn't available around the time of their wedding, that a particular venue will not allow decorations that she looked forward to using.  I always think of a venue that they would have enjoyed more for less money.  I love helping a bride and groom create little aspects to their wedding that only they will know about.  It could be a little something added to her bouquet that is a reminder of their first date.  I love it when I hear a bride and groom say in unison, "I really like that idea".  I know that another special moment has been added to their wedding day.  So many times these additional special moments don't cost a dime!

Wishing you the greatest of days!

http://www.greatestofdays.com/services.html
jan@greatestofdays.com
206-604-1908

Brides, Grooms and FIL's Paying for Weddings.

Many brides and grooms are paying for some if not all of their wedding expenses.  I like to think that Greatest of Days is unique in that I offer a free consultation to the bride and groom which is pretty standard, but I also offer a free hour of consultation with the parents particularly if they are paying for a wedding.  There are even occasions where I'll step in when a desperate mother says, "Can you talk to my daughter?" and just as often when a bride says, "I wish you could tell my mother that!"

There's a reason for this, and it is all in the effort to have a stress-free wedding day and the many days before that planning for that big day.  Reality is seldom perfect and planning a wedding can be stressful on more individuals than just the bride and the groom.  Stress can rear its ugly head on an emotional level, a financial level, and a level I'll call, "Where in the heck did that come from?"

I'll show this in various extremes.

Scenario #1.  Imagine Princess just became engaged to be married.  She has a sense of entitlement and always has.  She has either gotten almost everything she has ever wanted or feels that her day has finally come where she can at last have everything under the sun.  If parents are on the same wavelength, then that's fine.  Where the problem comes in, is when the parents simply cannot afford their daughter this luxury.

Scenario #2.  Mom and Dad have all the money in the world and quite often along with it brings control  and power.  Mom always wanted her daughter to have the wedding she never had and now she sees it as her turn to get the wedding she wish she had had.  When a bride or groom states a preference for any particular aspect of the wedding, they just might hear, "As long as I'm paying for it, you'll do no such thing!"

Scenario #3.  "I think you shoulds" which can start sounding like nails on a chalkboard.  All things become new again, but people have ideas that really take the cake sometimes.   I remember both my mother and my husband's mother doing this routine when we were choosing the music for our wedding.  The songs meant nothing to us and when there was a song recommended about sunshine when I knew the wedding was in December in a very rainy climate.  If "Look at the sunshine" had been sung, everybody might have walked out to go look for it!  My Mom thought it would be nice to have a song sung that she liked.  Never mind the fact that I had sung it for countless friends' weddings, even with a former boyfriend!  Not happening!  We ended up rearranging a song that we liked by changing a few of the words and the tempo.

This is where I feel I can make a big difference in how things progress up to and at the wedding.  It's all psychology!  I'll talk to a bride and groom and go through with them what all is involved and how the costs can creep up.  Basically, it's bringing them into the reality of the parents who are paying for the wedding.  Secondly, in the case of the Penny Pusher Power Parent, I can speak with them and find out without them knowing, what it is that they are really dealing with.  Quite often its a bad memory or a vision of how they wanted their own wedding to be like that never happened.

Never forget that a parent can be feeling a big dose of separation anxiety, but would never admit to it.  If a parent has entirely wrapped his or her life around raising children, they could very well feel like they are wandering into unknown territory.  What people don't understand, they fear.  What they fear becomes an unrealistic expectation or misinterpretation.

In one sentence.  Everyone wants their feelings and concerns validated.  I have a heart that's big enough to hear both sides and two shoulders to be cried upon.  If it ends up with everyone smiling a genuine smile on the wedding day, I'm happy!  Worth every minute of listening!

Wishing you the greatest of days!

Greatest of Days
Event and Wedding Planning
www.greatestofdays.com
jan@greatestofays.com
206-604-1908

What do you mean by officiant?

You can go online and anyone can become an officiant if they register through Universal Life Church to fulfill the legal qualifications to become ordained and choose whatever title you prefer from a selection of categories.  Many people do it just to be able to perform wedding ceremonies for friends or family.  You have to promise to honor all beliefs and comply with all state laws.  In Washing State, you have be ordained through some church.  It's about 10-minute process through ULC which has been around since 1959.  We could do any kind of ceremony, but we stick to weddings.

My husband and I have both gone through ULC to be able to officiate for weddings.  I enjoy helping people design their wedding ceremony.  Many people just want a very small wedding, have mixed beliefs in their families, don't want to go through months of counseling through a church so an officiant is a great solution to these situations.  Some people are widowed or divorced and don't want to go through all the pomp and ceremony that come with traditional weddings.  We have performed wedding ceremonies where there were hundreds of people, however.  Some people choose an officiant simply because they want to be able to customize their ceremony more than what they could in a regular church.  We let family members of friends of the bride and groom participate in any of the religious aspects to the wedding.  We choose to remain very neutral.

I won't speak to other states, but there are only two lines (never seen or met anyone who performed this type of ceremony) that are necessary in Washington State to make a couple legally married.   The, Do You?, Do You? (questions to make sure they aren't entering the marriage under duress), and then pronouncing them as husband and wife.  Really, that's all!  We would do those too, if people wanted it that way, but people like to personalize it.  We avoid ceremonies that take on the feel of a theatrical performance rather than a solemn occasion.  Speaking from experience, we were disappointed to get a review on not being theatrical enough.  Sorry, that is not why we do perform wedding ceremonies!  At that same wedding, people said it was a wonderful ceremony.  Go figure!

Some people choose an officiant to make it a legal marriage and then have a more elaborate wedding (sometimes even with an officiant) months or years later when they can afford a bigger wedding, when someone has returned from being overseas, or any number of reasons.

You won't believe this, but when we say that we can officiate, some people really think that we are qualified to officiate at sporting events!!   No!  That's a totally different game!!

You should always check into your own state's laws.

Wishing you the greatest of days!






@http://www.greatestofdays.com
http://www.facebook.com/greatestofdays
206-604-1908

I Only Have One Goal!

When it comes to my clients, I want their event to bring one result!  Only one?  Yes!  If this goal isn't met, then I am not happy!  It is very simple, costs nothing and yet it's priceless!  It's a smile!

What does that smile say?  I want it to show that I listened to their vision in their head and asked just the right questions that brought out their creativity, sense of humor or just a special feeling that they have about their special day.  I want it to say that the first thing they saw when entering the room made them speechless.  A smile can say that I helped them make their event unique, or that they notice the one detail that is their inside joke.  I want that smile to appear on the bride and groom's faces that only they and I know about.  It's probably from adding a little element that has only a special meaning to them perhaps reflecting on how they met, a trip they took together, their favorite restaurant, a hobby they both share or maybe even a reminder of an embarrassing moment that cracks them up whenever they think about it.  You know, one of those moments when we say, "It wasn't funny at the time, but now we can't help but laugh about it!"

One of my tag lines is "Creating memories to bring a smile to your face for years to come!"  I couldn't be more serious about anything!  It is my goal to create some of those memories with a client during the planning process.  It should be a good time!

Happy planning!

Wedding Gift Theft and Other Problems with Wedding Gifts

The wedding gift area at a reception is often located in the area where your guests first enter at your reception. So what's the problem with that? If you are at any place where the public can walk in and blend in as an impostor guest, you are taking your chances of the wrong person taking your gifts home. Even if the gift area isn't by the entrance you are taking a risk. Ideally, you would be able to hire someone who offers coat check services who will not only watch your guests' belongings but also the gifts and you can then keep the gifts secured near the entrance. Imagine the disappointment you would feel to find out that someone made off with your gifts or cards containing cash or their best wishes for you when someone had the audacity to pose as the person responsible for loading your gifts. The gift area needs to be assigned to a very responsible person who knows to look for this type of behavior.

Remember that your wedding is a day of blending both of your families who perhaps have not even met each other until that day. As unthinkable as it is, there are people who prey on weddings to steal even from a bride and groom by merely pretending to know the bride and groom. This is wedding crashing at its worst!

There is a major mishap that is much more common regarding the gifts you receive. I'll start with the end result first. Change roles for a moment. You have just received a thank you note thanking you for the crystal goblets. That is all great and wonderful, but you happen to know that you gave them camping gear! How could this happen? It's as simple as cards not being taped securely to a gift!  If this has happened to you, now you know why.

Also, if you have someone bringing in two gifts, have a system in place for the person in charge of your gifts to color code both gifts so that you know that they came from the same person.  You could also use corresponding colored stickers or write a number on both of the boxes. There are systems with numbered stickers, but I've found some of them to be way too small to recognize easily. Don't rely on wrapping paper to always be a clue. People often will bring a gift wrapped in identical paper that someone else has chosen to wrap a gift. Perhaps people bring one gift from one of your registries and another gift they had wrapped somewhere else or at their home. Either way you just can't be too careful!  Do whatever you have to do to assure that the corresponding gift is matched with the correct guest.

Most important of all is to write those thank you notes and actually mail them.  You don't want to appear ungrateful.

Thank you notes..that is another blog in itself!   As much as you want an RSVP, your guests want to know that you actually got their gift!  It's all about common courtesy!


Wishing you the greatest of days!

Hidden Wedding Costs!

Sometimes it's easy to not see the forest for the trees. I was at an industry networking event recently and someone asked all of those attending if they had ever seen a wedding start on time. Lo and behold, only another Wedding Coordinator and myself raised our hands. I was surprised at that because I know that this particular group of people had been to literally hundreds of weddings, if not more. I think this goes to show you how just a little bit of extra help on your wedding day can make a difference.

Why would it be important to stay on schedule on your wedding day? Imagine if you will, that you get a late start with your hair and makeup which makes you and your bridal party late in getting dressed. When people feel rushed on top of being caught up in the emotions of the day, crazy things happen all the way from things getting spilled to people falling down. Having to wear a type of shoe you don't normally wear, can contribute to that. When rushed, something is forgotten back at the house causing extra time on the road. If you aren't careful, you will have people running in all directions when you need them together and there for you the most.

I haven't mentioned the hidden monetary costs yet. This is when it gets really scary! If your photographer is waiting for you, you're taking a chance of having them bill you for extra hours because you want them there for your entire reception. You will have to pay them for staying late unless something is agreed to in the contract. Same goes for the DJ and worst yet would be the venue charging you for extra time. In the meantime, your limo driver is patiently waiting to get you to the hotel or wondering if he's going to get you to the airport on time.

Why would a Wedding Coordinator make the difference between things running on time versus running behind schedule? A Wedding Coordinator will create a timeline with built-in cushions of time to make things run smoothly, be in contact with all of your vendors and foresee potential problems among other things. They will also have a bridal "fashion emergency" kit and a number of ways to help when problems arise so that you don't have to interrupt your day with unnecessary decisions. There are ways of dealing with the bridesmaid or aunt who is always running late. Planning in advance of your wedding day can give you more confidence that the key people are right where you need them!

Wishing you the greatest of days!

20 Wedding Tips

Wedding Tip #1: Do you know someone who wants their wedding to be unique? A good way to do that is to ask a wedding coordinator about venues that most people don't even know about.

Wedding Tip #2: Here are a couple of advantages to having your bridesmaids wear black dresses. You can find black dresses at many types of stores and your bridesmaids will be more likely to have occasions in the future to wear their dresses again. Black can be accented with many colors and look spectacular.

Wedding Tip #3: If you have always envisioned a certain type of flower to be in your wedding bouquets and flower arrangements, remember that certain flowers are only available according to mother nature's calendar. Flowers that grow in the wintertime that are white, are more fragrant to attract more insects for pollination. Gardener's side note!

Wedding Tip #4: Very few venues allow candles, especially open-flamed candles. When you search for a venue, be very specific about what you envision for decorating. It's better to find out early before you spend money on decorations.

Wedding Tip #5: Family and friends might show some sides of their personalities you've never seen before during the planning of your wedding. They might subconsciously be experiencing a sense of loss, a fear of the unknown and very well might be getting bombarded with the dreaded, "Now when are YOU getting married?" Patience helps out a lot. Thank them often for their help!

Wedding Tip #6: I think it's a nice gesture to arrange for both new mothers-in-law to enjoy a high tea the day after the wedding. They'll love you for it!

Wedding Tip #7: Did you know that the average bride spends around 30 hours per week planning her wedding? That amount of time spent with an event planner would see her get her life back and her wedding well on it's way to being planned.

Wedding Tip #8: You can find out how much the average wedding costs in your area, but I think I'll let you figure this one out. I'm curious to see if any of you who are NOT in the wedding industry can get that magic number. Tell you more about that number some other time.

Wedding Tip #9: Often people will leave something home before going to the wedding. I recommend using semi-transparent plastic bins in different colors and some of these bins have dry erase labels. Bins with lids that open on the top without removing the entire lid are great. Use different colors of bins according to their function, i.e. guestbook table, gift table, chairs, reception tables, head table and so forth. Bins with lids that open on the top without removing the entire lid are great. I don't recommend most storage tubs with lids that fold together to the center. The lids tend to come off of the side hinges and, it wastes a lot of time trying to reattach them. Make sure that any lid attaches well and that the bin itself is easy to carry.

Wedding Tip #10: If a bride-to-be happens to have a fiance' who just wants to show up at the wedding and have nothing to do with the planning, make choosing the tuxes on of the first things you do. He will be more likely to get involved sooner. Think about the things he would be most likely to enjoy planning such as the music, limo, the honeymoon. There are things expected of the groom and his family and he might be willing to work off of a list.

Wedding Tip #11: On your wedding day, if you want to remember loved ones who have passed away there are many wonderful ways to honor them. Think about having your florist design your bouquet with a particular number of a certain flower or a complimentary color of the flowers in your bouquet, to represent your loved ones. I love adding meaning without additional costs.

Wedding Tip #12: The word PROVIDE in "venue speak" does not always mean it's part of the package they are offering. It might just mean that they can make something such as linens in a particular color, an extra table, microphone or any number of items or services available, but not without an extra fee. Be very specific and ask a lot of questions! Pretend you are looking at a hospital bill.

Wedding Tip #13: One of the possible consequences of having your wedding over a holiday weekend are the added expenses of travel for your out of town guests as well as traffic snarls that come with holidays. You should arrange well in advance for lodging for your guests. Ironically, without careful planning, your guests might have to take more time off from work. Choosing a holiday weekend might be putting them at more risk of added delays, overbooking, layovers, etc.

Wedding Tip #14: If you are allergic to a variety of flowers, there are people who specialize in making beautiful silk flower arrangements. You can even rent them. People have actually sniffed them and said that they smell good when in reality they were completely odorless! They can look that real and are very durable!

Wedding Tip #15: People will appear from out of nowhere to have "suggestions" for your wedding! For example, one person might think that the cake is the most important thing in the world, for another it will be the music or flowers and so forth. Determine the top 5-10 things that are the most important to you. This helps determine your budget. Smile, nod a lot and say "Thank you".. and have your OWN wedding!

Wedding Tip #16: If you are a bride or a member of the bridal party and will be on your feet for hours, bring a second pair of shoes to switch and and out of and your feet will thank you! You'd also be amazed at how many brides wear creative tennis shoes underneath a beautiful dress. Sometimes the groom and groomsmen will follow suit and wear tennis shoes. Creativity and comfort, all good! When they say that a change is as good as a vacation, your feet would agree.

Wedding Tip #17: Please hire a professional DJ! You will be so glad that you did. This vendor can make or break your wedding reception and a good DJ knows how to read a crowd, will make announcements to keep things on track and help make your reception memorable in a positive way.

Wedding Tip #18: Many people want their weddings to be environmentally friendly. There are countless ways to accomplish this. One simple way is to plan to have someone take floral arrangements from the wedding to a retirement center, nursing home, homeless shelter or some other place where flowers might be appreciated.

Wedding Tip #19: Before deciding to make your own invitations, make a few samples first. Be prepared for the investment of the materials and supplies and hours of work into making your own invitations. Allow for 5%-10% or more for "Ooops!" such as those you forgot to invite, invitations you accidentally cut to the wrong size, misspelled a word, name or things that happen when your mind wanders away from a project. If you make your own the Save-the-Dates and you find that to be overwhelming, you might not want to tackle making your invitations.

Wedding Tip #20: A good professional DJ will make your wedding much more memorable than someone with an i-pod. They provide SO much more than music for your wedding that you can't even imagine. They know how to make everyone feel included and have fun. A bad DJ can do just the opposite. We always suggest hiring a reputable and professional DJ who has a good sound system.

As always, wishing you the greatest of days!

Greatest of Days
Wedding and Event Planning and Design
Wedding Officiating
www.greatestofdays.com

Let us Give You a Helping Hand and You Can Enjoy the Applause!

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Bride Can't Stop Laughing During Vows

Greatest of Days (Event and Wedding Planning and Design) Wedding Officiating

We were hoping to get married on this date, but ...

It makes me sad when I hear of a couple who has wanted to get married on a certain date but have had to postpone their wedding, sometimes more than once.  Often it's due to the lack of money or an unfortunate set of circumstances due to changes in their employment status, health or family situations.  It makes me wish I could have spoken with them to see if there would have been some way to help them.  I can't help but wonder if they'd had some tips to cut down the expenses or solutions for saving time, if they could have avoided postponing their wedding.  Time and money, if only they were friends at the same time!  Who hasn't experienced the lack of one or both at some point?  Very few people.

I just read a recent statistic that the average bride-to-be spends 30.4 hours per week planning her wedding.  Does that sound too much like a full-time job to you?  I know right now that this person has no spare time and probably didn't feel like she had spare time even before she started planning her wedding.  She might not be aware of how much of her life she could get back by hiring a Wedding Planner.  If that same bride was to spend 30.4 hours with a Wedding Planner, I am certain that instead of feeling tired and overwhelmed, she would feel a sense of relief and a large portion of her planning would be out of the way. 

Perhaps you ask, aren't Wedding Planners really expensive?  As Wedding Planners, vendors give us discounts because they appreciate us bringing business to them.  I pass these discounts directly to the client.  Most of my discounts range from 5%-20%.  That adds up.  I won't recommend a vendor merely on discounts, however.  I think it's most important that your personalities and visions are a good match.  I love it if I end up saving a client more money than I cost them!  This is before you add in the value of a Wedding Planner's experience and reduced stress that comes with hiring a Wedding Planner.  We are up on trends, on the lookout for problems, and listening to everything you want.  We also act as a liaison or an advocate for you with a vendor, venue or even a family member or friend involved with the wedding.  We definitely can reduce time spent running around, searching on the internet or getting so many people involved in your wedding planning process that your head begins to spin.  

I like to think that we can shorten an engagement period.  Perhaps even by months.  Recently, I had the opportunity to have a video made for my business (one more thing I have to add to my website, but it's on my Facebook page!).  I thought that the best thing I could do was to show how I can coordinate vendors for a wedding.  Within 24 hours I had 14 vendors who wanted to participate, with just a promise of lunch and mentioning their business on the video.  We had 5 days to prepare for a shoot that would last for 2 hours.  The vendors that came forward are quality vendors and are very nice people who are passionate about their professions.  This is just an example of how nice it is to know so many people who would be just as eager to serve a client.

If you don't like long engagements, or you see someone struggling during the planning of their wedding, you might consider an inexpensive consultation with a Wedding Planner.  That might even be a nice engagement gift to give to a friend, or daughter or other family member!

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

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Bargain Bridal and Bridesmaid's Dresses!

Two years ago I had a bride who had an extremely tight budget and I really wanted to make her dream wedding come true.  She wanted her bridesmaids to wear sage green dresses.  This is when the bargain shopper in me comes alive!  I visited two Nordstrom's Racks over a month's time in the Puget Sound area and found beautiful dresses that were all in the same color and style.  The trick is to match the style numbers on the tags sew into the dresses and to shop often.  The great part was that I found the dresses in every size that we needed for her bridesmaids from sizes 10 on up to 18W.  No, the greatest part was that they only cost $25.00 each and in no way did they look hideous!  We were even able to purchase an extra one in case they would have to have a larger size later on.  She wanted her matron of honor to wear something different than her bridesmaids that she would be comfortable in because she was self-conscious of being very thin.  We found a style that complimented the other dresses nicely, and her matron of honor felt confident that she looked nice in the dress.  Her dress cost $35.00.  So we got 4 dresses for $110.00

The bride did not want to wear a white dress and wanted something unique and found a beautiful satin antique gold skirt with a train and top at a second-hand dress shop.  The top was too tight, but she got such a good deal on the skirt that it was worth purchasing.  We went to one fabric store and found the perfect fabric in a matching color with accents of gold thread in the fabric.  We took that fabric to a dressmaker and the bride got a beautiful top made that laced up in the back.  Her skirt and custom top came to a total of just under $200.00.  This bride needed a larger size which would have been difficult to find at an average bridal shop.  She looked radiant on her wedding day and no one would have guessed she got such good bargains!  The bride and her bridal party were very pleased with their dresses for a grand total of $310.00.

Bargains are to be had if you are willing to shop using unusual methods.  With a slow economy and the fact that people are concerned about the environment, recycling dresses is very popular. A few years ago I noticed that brides would buy more than one wedding dress just in case they changed their mind.  Not many brides have that kind of money now!  There are many ways to find dresses that haven't even been worn.

You can email me through my website if you would like to learn more about ways to find dresses at bargain prices that look fabulous.  Another tip!  Sometimes it is actually less expensive to have someone design and make your dress than buying a dress at a bridal store!  I'm not suggesting that you avoid shopping at bridal stores because I know of some smaller shops that have fabulous prices on custom gowns.  The simple fact is that there are more options that brides are unaware of when it comes to finding that perfect wedding dress or bridesmaids' dresses.

(Above)  One of the $25.00 dresses.

(Below) the $35.00 dress

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

www.greatestofdays.com

jan@greatestofdays.com

What Is the Role of A Wedding Coordinator?

Unlike what you might see on the TV shows and movies about Wedding Coordinators, our job is not as glamorous as one might imagine.  It is exciting, however, and an honor that we get to spend more time with a bride than any other vendor for her wedding.  We do what we do because we are passionate about helping a bride and groom, their families and friends so that everyone can truly enjoy their wedding day rather than work during that special day.  It is impossible in one blog entry to go into every detail of what the role of a Wedding Coordinator is, but I will try to at least give you a glimpse.

Most Wedding Coordinators will offer three basic variations of planning packages with a few more that are a blending of those basic packages.  This is just to give you a picture of what a Wedding Coordinator can do for a client and everyone involved in her wedding.

The first level of of planning packages is more than likely just to help a bride in choosing vendors/venues in which the Coordinator will offer a selection of 3 or so for a set price per vendor category search.

The second package is probably along the lines of a Day-of-Coordination (DOC).  These packages are popular when a bride has chosen the vast majority of her vendors, except for maybe a couple of them.  This bride feels that she needs some help pulling everything together, is somewhat overwhelmed thinking about her wedding day and has concerns about how everything is going to come together on her wedding day.  Unlike it sounds, a Day-of-Coordination involves on average 30-80 hours of work, not just showing up on the wedding day!  Some planners include directing the rehearsal with this and others do not.  I visit the venue as well as take a quick glance at the contracts from vendors primarily to look for a potential problems.  It cannot be considered a legal review.  From information we have gathered from them, we sometimes have to be the bearer of bad news, but that's better than on your wedding day not being able to do half of what you had planned on for decorating, just as an example.

The third basic package would be a Full Coordination in which the Coordinator helps a client choose a vast majority of her vendors.  It could even include assistance in choosing the wedding gown, attire for the bridal party, reviewing a venue, meeting together with the bride and different vendors and anyone who might be closely working with the bride.   Coordinators generally offer in this type of package to direct the rehearsal.  A Coordinator will be there specifically for the bride and groom on the day of the wedding and act as a liaison for them and their guests with any vendor and the venue.

With the two previous planning packages mentioned, a Coordinator will work closely with all of the vendors and a bride to develop a timeline for the entire wedding day so that things stay on schedule.  This can save a bride a lot of money because if you have to pay for an extra hour for a DJ or a limousine that's sitting outside the building because things are behind schedule those extra dollars can be significant.  If a venue charges you extra for an additional hour, pretty soon you could have hundreds of dollars added to your venue bill.

Sometimes it's the little things that make a difference when there is a Coordinator on the scene.  We realize that your guests are the most important people in your life and will go out of our way to make sure everyone is comfortable.  If you have a grandmother going through a particularly hard time who you think could use a hug, we'll be glad to get acquainted and give her an extra smile and a hug.  At one wedding that I accompanied my husband to that he was officiating, the mother of the bride said that they wouldn't need me to bring a bridal emergency kit but I always do anyway.  Perhaps she was thinking it would cost money, but I wouldn't do that because I thinks it's just good customer service.  Within five minutes of arriving, I was helping a bridesmaid get makeup off of her dress and also making repairs to the bride's dress so that the bustle would stay in place.  Again, it's the little things that make your day easier.  Each Coordinator will have his or her own special ways of dealing with everything to set their client at ease.

Back to the unglamorous part of being a Wedding Coordinator, we handle other types of emergencies or situations that come up.  Since are usually the first to arrive on the day of the wedding and the last to leave, we make those discoveries that have appeared overnight.  Imagine surprise graffiti, someone took off with the garbage cans, the city employee didn't unlock the restroom doors as promised and so forth.  Think of Murphy's Law.  We do our best to make you unaware that Murphy ever showed up!  We like to take care of problems in such a way that you might not even know that there was a problem.

One more thing!  When do you think we hear the statement from a bride or her family that they wish they had hired a coordinator?  It is just before a wedding and right after a wedding!  By hiring a Coordinator early on you can save yourself a lot of stress, save money through discounts we can pass on to you, and save some relationships.  Yes the latter is sad but true when nerves get raw,  emotions run high, and when anyone in particular feels overworked or even exhausted from someone constantly changing their mind.

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

Brides First! The Honest Truth Might Surprise You!

 When I hear generalizations about what brides want for their weddings, it almost makes me cringe.  A wedding is not something that is dished up from a menu.  First off, who I am to know what a bride wants until I have spoken with her and perhaps her family at some length?  That is the most important part in my mind when offering to plan a wedding.  Listening!

I have to laugh when someone says, "Doesn't a bride always choose her (fill in the vendor) first?  A photographer can think she chooses a photographer, a bakery thinks she chooses her cake first, a venue manager will think that it is a venue.  People will also ask me if I have a preferred vendor for this or for that particular service.  I tell them, "No".  The client is so important and I don't want to match a bride up with a vendor that I think she will be uncomfortable with.  People have actually said to me, "Brides don't really care about decorations that much, or this or that, do they?"  To one bride it won't be important, but to another bride it might mean everything.  I figure it's my job to be led as well as to lead.

Planning a wedding is an emotional experience on many levels.   When a bride is consulting with her vendors, I want a bride to feel like she is walking through the door of her own home, wearing an old pair of comfortable shoes and talking to a good friend who knows what she's going to say next but listens as if they can read her mind.  I must explain further, I would never say that a vendor is purposely going to make anyone uncomfortable.  I think I happen to know some of the most amazing vendors who do a wonderful job and I have the greatest respect for them.  But, I'd compare it to thinking back to school and who was your favorite teacher.  There was something about that teacher that touched your heart, made you feel important or inspired you.  That's what I feel it should be like with various vendors and that doesn't happen accidentally.  

A bride will know when she is comfortable with a vendor or not, but why put her through unnecessary stress when you've gotten to know her likes and dislikes first?  If I sense that she is intimidated by opinionated people and would crawl into her shell and end up settling for something she didn't like, I'd feel terrible.  If she is bursting with ideas, I know she's going to want to talk to someone who will validate her ideas and get excited along with her and share her vision.  If she is so nervous about absolutely everything, then I want to put her in the hands of someone who is comforting and has no problem being patient and understanding and be willing to do a little hand-holding.  Again, I must say that most vendors are passionate about what they do and go out of their way to make a bride feel comfortable, but not all personalities match.

Would I myself ever turn a bride down?  When we first started our business, I will admit that I didn't feel like I could turn anyone away, and it's still difficult at times because I genuinely am a people person.  Just like my Dad!   A bride doesn't want to be treated with disrespect and neither do I.  I used to  reschedule an appointment  when a bride missed her first and second scheduled consultations.  Now I don't.  If a second scheduled initial consultation is missed, I figure that it just isn't meant to be.   I will of course call to make sure she is okay and that nothing happened to her.   I know that my time is valuable and I do not want to risk having this be a pattern for the next year or so.    

Those of us in the wedding profession wouldn't be in it if we didn't absolutely love it.  Sometimes that is the best of it and the worst of it!

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

Things You Should Know When Searching for a Venue!

I have at least 50 questions in my mind when I research venues.   I don't have a written list any more.  It's in my head!  I may only ask ten or more of these questions, but the other questions are being answered just from my walking around a venue.

I would say that the number one thing you need to know to prevent surprises down the road when it comes to venues, is to truly identify what the word provide means in the venue's terms.  Provide does not and I repeat, does not always mean free.  They can provide a million things, but you might pay for the extra chair, table, or an unexpected amount of money for anything you might consider to be very simple.  Sometimes these lists of charges might feel like you are looking at a bill from a hospital.  If you are prepared you won't be saying, "It cost how much for that?!"  I cannot tell you how many times I've heard from a client, "I wouldn't have ever thought of that!"  Those are the very same things that can really cause stress when it gets closer to your wedding.  It's not what you know but what you don't know that can hurt you.

I won't go into all of my questions that are going through my mind on a tour of a venue.  Suffice it to say that every venue is different.  If I had a dollar for every time I heard a venue ask, "If you can think of anything we should do, please tell me".  I am happy to because that helps their clients.

What are some of the most obvious things you might want to know about when you are venue searching?  Listed below are just few things that come to mind.  You might actually have things that are more of a concern to you that are not listed here.

1.  I always want to know if a venue is handicapped accessible because sometimes they are not. Don't assume that because your guests, young or old, are in good physical shape that you don't need to take this into consideration.  Your wedding is probably several months away.  Anyone can break a leg or injure a knee and end up using crutches.  Not to be negative here, but being prepared is what will give you peace of mind.  We've heard enough horror stories!

2.  Do they provide a licensed bartender for your wedding or event? If so, what is involved on your part?

3.  Do they allow candles?  Most do not!

4.  What are their rules for decorating?  This is big issue!  Get ready to hear them say that they do not allow tape, nails, tacks, glue, etc.  This can destroy a lot of what you might have visualized your wedding and reception to look like.

5.  How much time will you have to decorate?  Be sure to realize that two hours is nothing when you are dealing with decorating a venue.  This isn't the Thanksgiving dinner table you are used to decorating.

6.  A big thing I look for is parking. This could make the difference between your guests arriving on time or not.

7.  Do they have a shuttle service arrangement with local hotels?

8.  Do they have linens in other colors than just white that you won't have to pay extra for to compliment the colors of your wedding?

9.  If you hear that they have a good sound system, please don't assume it will be good for a wedding reception.  A professional DJ is worth his or her weight in gold!  The house sound systems quite frankly frighten me and I find them to be unreliable all too often.

10.  If you hear "we let you bring in your own food" be sure to clarify that!  They might really mean they allow licensed caterers from outside of their venue provide the food.  It doesn't necessarily mean you can cook your own food and bring it to the venue.

The more you know about your venue, the greater your wedding day will be!  It's easy to get into that mode of hearing what you want to hear, but it's better to step back and take a deep breath and really examine things closely.

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

10-10-2010. What is in a wedding day?

The 2010 wedding season will be more popular in October than normal. That is because of the novelty of 10-10-10 and it helps that that day falls on a Sunday.  I've found it interesting that some brides and grooms who have chosen this date for their wedding, are surprised that they find themselves in such large company.  It makes sense because it's just fun to have an unusual date for a major moment in one's life.  The groom might pitch in with, "I wanted to have a day that I would remember!"  I wonder if it is similar to parents choosing a name that they are certain no one else will be using to name a child.  How is it that these names end up being so popular and their child is one of many with the same name in a classroom a few years later?  I'm sure that someone has an answer to this phenomenon, but at the moment I don't really know.

It's not uncommon to find that people think that a long weekend is a good time to get married especially for those who have to travel.  But is it? Traffic is more congested from everyone else being on the road.  Airlines know when to increase prices just as the oil companies raise the price of gasoline.  I'll never forget a wedding that was delayed by 2 or more hours because of holiday traffic that the father of the bride was stuck in.  Granted, it didn't help that his car broke down or maybe it was the traffic that contributed to it breaking down!  That's not the worst part.  He was driving what was supposed to be a surprise gift for the bride and groom!  Popularity of a particular date or holiday can bring on an extra element of stress, and a better chance of your guests experiencing delays.

You want to know if your vendors are going to charge extra for their services on a holiday.  Are they going to make regular deliveries on a particular day and are they going to have less experienced help performing the tasks.  These may be things that you are willing to work with but it doesn't hurt to find out what you are in for.

We want our wedding days to go perfectly.  But it is best to remember that some things you can control, some things you cannot.  Mother nature can often render the worst storms when you are certain you've chosen your wedding day to be one with the best chances of good weather according to all the statistics.  If a bride is getting nervous, I try to gently remind her that though we want everything to go perfectly, does the average day go perfectly that has only a fraction of the details and emotions involved as their wedding day?  Probably not.  Chances are that with a lot of effort, 99% of everything will go wonderfully and no one will be the wiser to any unplanned events.  The secret is to be prepared for the most likely unexpected happenings.

No matter what the wedding date is, I find for myself that a positive attitude is a good companion to going with the flow, turning on a dime, choosing to laugh instead of scream, remembering to smile and above all, keeping a good sense of humor!  I guess I would stress one thing to brides. Sometimes those moments you would rather not live through, are the moments you are going to remember with a good laugh for years.  I threw my bouquet on the roof, but I'm still married years later!  Those years later are what your day is all about.  Planning is so important, but life happens and no one should feel guilty about that.  Keep It Simple and Steamlined!

So what is in a day?  A good mixture of everything you put into it.  By the way, next year "the day" will be 11-11-11.

Wishing you the greatest of days!