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Showing posts with label wedding ceremonies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wedding ceremonies. Show all posts

Sunday, August 21, 2016

What Does a Wedding Officiant Really Do?

There are many fabulous wedding officiants in the Seattle area.  I have great respect for all of them. In some parts of the country, officiants are not even considered to be wedding vendors. Perhaps it's such a foregone conclusion that someone is going to be in that role.  Perhaps it's the seriousness of the role that makes officiants seem different from other vendor choices.  We aren't an optional decision when it comes to weddings.  Someone has to make the marriage legal.


Recently, I was speaking about statistics with someone from a lead site.  They send vendors comparison reports on how much time it takes for the average vendor to respond.  They also will say if your prices are higher and lower than others.  I was concerned and in disagreement with them that I was higher priced than others when I know what industry standards are for Officiants in our area. However, I was very pleased with how our conversation continued.  The vendor service representative then said something that I hope I remember in the future for other business decisions. She said, "Most of the officiants charge less but our best performing officiants are in a higher price range similar to yours".  

We discussed reasons for that.  The first was the introductory response and how well it is written. On this particular lead site, you only have 1,000 characters including spaces to help someone feel comfortable and confident enough to inquire further about hiring you on one of the most important days in their life.  The second contributing factor of success was followup.  Yes, even for wedding officiants followup is as much of an issue as it is for any other type of entrepreneur.

Time is our biggest investment. There's a lot of work that goes into preparing a special ceremony. With the initial consultation (60-90 minutes), the goal is to reach the essence of their relationship. The consultation needs to include topics from how they met, what a typical date is like, their hobbies, interests and how their personalities blend. I want to know who is better at leading and being practical and who is better is a supporting and encouraging role. My favorite clue into what makes them unique is hearing about their marriage proposal.  Many people meet online, and those stories can sometimes seem like a miracle that they even got to know each other.  The goal is to create a ceremony that reflects a couple's personality and hopes for the future.

Then the work begins.  I generally have enough to know what kind of ceremony they would like.  I know if they will be what my husband affectionately termed as "repeaters or non-repeaters".  Non-repeaters are lucky to get the words "I do" out and don't want to remember even the shortest phrases.  Other couples will say, "Why have a wedding ceremony if we aren't going to write our own vows?"  No two weddings are alike just as no two couples are alike.  I can't forget to mention rehearsals! Rehearsals are often very confusing without an officiant. Writing a ceremony is somewhat like writing the first chapter in a book.  The rest of the story is for the couple to compose.

I don't ever want to fall into the class of "cheap officiants".  Putting my heart and soul into getting a glimpse into the heart and soul of my couples is priceless.  It's more than just a legality or a contract to be recognized by a county and state and making sure everyone signs and dates on the right line. Much more!

Yes officiants often are placed in the role of a wedding planner even though it can appear like they are herding rabbits!  Are there really rabbit herders?  Doubt it.

Saturday, May 10, 2014

Always Bring A Copy Of Your Wedding Ceremony To Your Wedding!

What if your officiant doesn't show up or call you to say they are on their way?

Here's the scenario.  Everyone is ready.  All of your bridal party is ready to be lined up to proceed down the aisle.  You're getting nervous that you haven't heard from the officiant since the rehearsal.  You've given them 10, 20, 30 minutes and now you're in real freak-out mode!

Well, you waited this long so here's what you can do for another 15 minutes.  Find someone who is comfortable reading and speaking in front of crowds and have them get ordained so that they can perform a wedding ceremony.   You can check on different states' wedding laws and become ordained to perform a ceremony if your state allows this.  Literally in about 10-15 minutes you could have someone to officiate your wedding.  There is no charge to become ordained!

This is the part that you will want as part of your wedding day preparations.  If you have been working with an officiant, you should have been emailing each other to get a final draft of your ceremony.  Do yourself a favor and print it!
You can bring your ceremony with your vows.

Wishing you the greatest of days!

Wedding Officiating

Saturday, September 11, 2010

The Surprises to Crafting a Wedding Ceremony

My husband I both officiate for non-denominational weddings.  It is a true joy to be able craft a ceremony that has special meaning that comes from the depths of a couple's hearts filled with love.  It can reflect their personalities, idiosyncrasies, special moments in their courtship, their hope of building a beautiful future together and so much more.

One thing I can say is that, almost without fail is that when we first ask questions at the initial consultation, they will say something along the lines of "I guess we never thought of that!"  It can pertain to whether or not they want to repeat the vows to each other or just want to say "I do".  Sometimes it's when we bring up what the issue of what they would like us to wear.  We explain that we don't want to clash in the pictures, or appear overdressed or underdressed for the type of wedding they wish to have regardless of whether it is a themed wedding or not.

Here is the big surprise!  The one thing that seems to get the longest pause is when we ask them how they would like to be introduced after they are pronounced husband and wife. They usually look at each other with a puzzled or awkward glance.  Perhaps this is when reality hits them and the bride seems to feel like she has to make a final decision on whether she is keeping her name or not.  We will generally list a few options for introducing them as husband and wife to all of the guests at their wedding.

Just a few examples that might be added after stating, "It is my pleasure to introduce to you for the first time as husband and wife...

Mr. and Mrs. Michael Smith
Michael and Michelle Smith
Michael and Michelle
Michael Smith and Michelle Jones
Michael Smith and Michelle Jones-Smith

The best part is seeing the looks on their faces as I pronounce them as husband and wife.  It's that once in a lifetime moment that gets me every time!  What an honor and privilege it is to be able share this moment.  It brings a smile to my face every time, but then again, I'm smiling all the way to the wedding just thinking about the couple and being so happy for them!  No kidding!

Yes, I must say, I love officiating weddings!  I do, I do!

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!
www.greatestofdays.com