Planning a Wedding is a Time and Money Balancing Act

Balancing Money and Time to Plan Your Wedding

1.  Truth #1.

The reason why weddings seem so expensive is because there are so many moving parts and elements that need to be put together.  They all cost money.

We all excel at different things and absolutely can't stand other types of chores, jobs, duties, etc.  The same goes for planning a wedding.  Why spend your valuable time on something you hate.  I know that with the DIY craze, it would be easy to fall into that trap that gets bigger and bigger.  The trap that comes from saying, "I can do that myself!"  Yes, maybe you can, but do you love doing it?  If not you're likely to add unnecessary stress.  

2.  Rephrase your stress points.

If you catch yourself saying, "I need to do this" or "I need to do that", rephrase it to "it would be preferable if I did this or that".  Surprisingly, it lowers the priority a little or even makes you think it's not necessary to do the "this or that" at all.

3.  It's okay to let go!

I've read somewhere that the average (usually a bride) spends the equivalent of 7-1/2 weeks of 40-hour work weeks planning a wedding.  That is a lot of time and energy.  It takes some of us longer than others to realize that it's okay to hire some things out and realize we can't possibly come close to being as talented as the professionals in all of the categories we need.

4.  Time Management and Planning.

The things that couples don't realize when they are planning a wedding is that a lot of the DIY projects take place very close to the wedding.  Especially the flowers, making your own cake, etc!  Regarding the flowers, it doesn't matter whether they are of the "wear and carry" or "decor" categories..they take up time when you least have it.  That's not even including the tasks that people procrastinate on, constant interruptions and all the mini celebrations that are taking place at that time.  

5.  You only get married once.  Ideally!

If it's difficult for you to think about hiring tasks out, think again.  You wouldn't expect to be able to put braces on your teeth by yourself.  We hope we only get married once so you shouldn't have to justify handing out some headaches.

6.  Invest where it counts.  Determine your "dreads!" 

You can hire people to do everything from addressing your invitations, keeping track of RSVP's, cleaning up after the wedding, childcare on site at your wedding, theft protection with coat-check companies who will guard your gifts and your guests' possessions.

My biggest suggestion would be to hire a "Day-of Coordinator".  (there really is no such thing which is to your advantage).  A "Day-of Coordinator" actually does most of what a Wedding Planner does except find vendors for you.  You will want to look for one who will contact all of your vendors, verify your contracts to see if your plan actually matches what is in the contract, will tour your venue, conduct a rehearsal (might cost extra) and do their best to inhibit behavior from anyone that could risk you not getting your deposit back.  They will create a realistic timeline so that they day flows smoothly since they know the wedding industry and what the vendors need to do a good job for you.

Wishing you the greatest of days!

Check out our other programs for couples planning a wedding or needing wedding officiating, individuals planning events and businesses who want to market through hosting events.

15 Ways Couples Can Help Wedding Vendors Provide Their Best Service

15 Ways Couples Can Help Wedding Vendors Provide Their Best Service

Every vendor really wants to do the best job possible for your wedding. What can a bride/groom do to insure that they are able to do exactly that? Here are some general suggestions that go across most if not all vendor lines. 

This might be the only place you will hear this!

1.  Communicate with your vendor in a timely manner during the planning process.   If they reach out to you, they probably need information from you to proceed. 

2.  If your vendors don't reach you as quickly as you might like, they are probably in a meeting or working an event. Remember that they will show you the same courtesy when you are having a consultation with them or they are at your wedding.

3.  Ask if they have a questionnaire to complete before the consultation.  If so, have it done before your appointment.  If you can email it to them even earlier, all the better.

4.  Don't be afraid to ask a lot of questions at a consultation.  

5.  Keep your vendors informed of any major problems/questions that have come up as soon as you can.

6.  Notify the appropriate vendors of any changes after you have considered the change carefully.  Limiting the number of changes, especially closer to the wedding will make things flow more smoothly. Changing your mind often will increase everyone's chance of confusion and possibly result in things not being as you wanted for your wedding.  Emailing is the best way because it creates a record that can be referred to or transferred to notes in a file created for you.  It never hurts to double-check.

7.  Try to keep your questions relevant to what a vendor actually does for a wedding.  They want to help you, but their time is better spent in their area of expertise.  When they suggest that you need a coordinator, they are trying to save you valuable time and money as well as for themselves.

8.  Try to keep all of your appointments and give at least 24 hours notice if possible.  You should text, email or call or a combination of any of these.  Depending on where your vendor is and what they are doing, their access to any of these might vary.

9.  Have some idea of what you want your wedding to be like.  When asked what you envision for your wedding, as much as possible avoid responses such as:

A.  "We don't really care".

B.  "My Mom (or whomever) is taking care of all of that".  Come prepared with details of what is being done.

C.  "We don't think that anyone will cause problems at our wedding".  (You really have no way of knowing how people are going to react on such an emotionally-charged day added to alcohol).

D.  "We haven't really thought of a budget".  A vendor will be wondering if you are even able to pay them and won't have as good of an idea of what you want for your wedding. 

E.   "We're just shopping for prices."  This is okay on some level because sometimes that is the only starting point or ice breaker you have!   If you're speaking with a professional vendor, be honest with yourself.  If a particular type of vendor is really important to you and you know that they are integral to your wedding day and future memories, you want a quality product.  The lowest prices are often the costliest decisions.  Set what you feel are priorities for your wedding. You might not know it, but some professionals take offense at this "price shopping" response, because they feel that you have not taken the time to check out their quality of work which they generally take a lot of pride in versus a non-professional who probably doesn't have a portfolio, testimonials or nearly the experience.  They could wonder how serious you really are about that particular aspect of your wedding.  

   

10.  Assumptions you should never make:

 A.  Your friends will help you set up and clean up.

 B.  Your bridal party and guests will show up on time.  Do what you can to encourage people to be on time.  (The opposite can be a problem, too)  If people show up too early, they might want to help and that can actually hinder vendors trying to do their job.

        

11.   Remember that your vendors working at your wedding are people!  They will probably be working many hours and to do their best they will need a chance to eat.  No fainting vendors!  You can arrange to provide a plate, or a trip through the buffet line after your guests have been served or have gone though a buffet line.  Offer them a little bit of privacy as they won't want to be seen eating in front of the guests if possible and they may only have a few short minutes to eat.

12.  Ask if a vendor needs a tablecloth and order them tablecloths that go all the way down to the floor.  They will need to hide a number of things that are unsightly or just don't want everything in plain sight.

13.  Tell a few key people who will be at your wedding what some of the venue rules are.  This is especially true for those things that might prevent you from getting your deposit back.

14.  Don't expect a vendor to wait for payments.  Sometimes brides have an attitude of  "..but it's my wedding day!"  To this type of bride, I would say, think of it this way.  You expect a paycheck for your work and wouldn't appreciate it if your boss said, "I'm not paying you today because it is my birthday!"  (A little tongue in cheek there)

15.  Last but not least, don't procrastinate to hire a vendor.  Remember that most wedding vendors do the majority of their work in a 3-4 month period of time.  This also can set limitations on the number of vendors available for whatever service you need.

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

Do You Know Your Bride Type?

Let's shed a light on it!

Headlight

1.  Do you feel like a deer in the headlights?  Let's change that to dear in the headlights even though I think deer are very cute and sweet, too.  Maybe you feel blinded by fear or are paralyzed with indecision.  Maybe you have been stopped in your tracks by the bombardment of unwanted advice. Maybe you would just like to say "Beam me up Scotty!"

Spotlight

2.  Do you love all of the attention to be set on you?  You want nothing more than to be a prima donna, belle of the ball and it's all about you!  You are willing to push everyone aside so you can make your grand entrance during the whole planning process as well as the wedding.

Laser Beam

3.  Are you ultra focused and you know exactly what you want and you are afraid to let anyone help you?  Maybe you know exactly what you want and are blinded by the lack of a limitless budget.  You might even be doing some damage being so focused that you refuse to listen to suggestions to guide you away from costly mistakes.

Searchlight

4.  Do you feel like you need to find out who's going to get you?  Do you feel that everyone is going to rip you off?  Are you wondering where you will find the vendors that make you comfortable, match your style and fit your budget.  Maybe it feels like that there is no one out there who "gets" your vision.

Mood light 

5.  Do you want your wedding to ooze with ambience, romance and glistening light and sparkles everywhere?  You can never have enough bling.

Let's shine a light on why all of this matters!

Okay!  Why is all of this important for a wedding planner to know?  We need to know who we should suggest for vendors who get you!  I guess you could say we need to be able to find your "Vendor Type" not just find a vendor in any particular vendor category and not just someone who could do the job. Our goal is to match ideal vendors with ideal clients.  That is exactly why we like to know many vendors and stay from preferred vendor lists.

Would You Rather Have Wedding 101 or Wedding 9-1-1?

Wedding 101 or 9-1-1?   Bridging the Gap!

I speak with wedding vendors on a regular basis and I want to be able to make their jobs easier. The end beneficiary is the wedding couple and their families.  I even had a mother of a bride (with her daughter and future son-in-law’s reluctance) pay for a wedding planner because all she wanted to was buy her dress and the next thing she would do was sitting down before the ceremony!  That same reluctant couple actually toasted me during the wedding reception with a huge thank you and stated they could have never done it with me and the bride’s father actually said in his toast that other people with a wedding in their future should hire Greatest of Days!  Most couples think that they don't need a Wedding Planner or they have a friend or relative who can fill that role.  It sounds like an honor to be placed in that role, but in reality that person is probably going to be the one who has the least chance of really enjoying the wedding, or... will automatically fall into the guest mode leaving the couple getting married stranded.  Ironic, but true.

Here are some misconceptions people have about hiring wedding planners!

~  Wedding Planners are too expensive.

     Wedding Planners have so many options to help whomever is planning a wedding.  So many times when a couple or perhaps a mother is thinking that they are saving money by doing things on their own, they can actually be wasting money.  Wedding Planners have discounts offered to them that the couples can benefit from that they can't get on their own.  Every couple engaged to be married owes it to themselves to at least have a complimentary consultation with a Wedding Planner.  If you believe that time is money, you really owe it to yourself to see what you will save in time alone.   For an average wedding, without a Wedding Planner, the equivalent of 7-1/2 40-hour work weeks is spent planning a wedding.  I’d say to wedding vendors, recommend a complimentary consultation with a Wedding Planner as a  gift to your brides.  Chances are, they will thank you for it!  

Please look at our various Wedding Planning Packages.

~   A couple will often have friends who seem like they are naturals to help plan a wedding. There are so many things that the recruited or volunteering friends and family members just don't know about the actual wedding day and what can happen.  Wedding Planners spend a lot of time networking, doing research and taking classes.  
  

   If a website isn't kept up to date or does not reflect a particular vendor's personality, you just don't know if they will be the fit for you or not.  As Wedding Planners we try our best to match vendors and clients according to their personalities, styles and budget range.  Just as a bride/couple is looking for an ideal vendor, a vendor is also looking for an ideal client.  Vendors learn that not every bride is going to be one that they will work well with.  

  

~  A Wedding Planner will take over my wedding.

      Wedding planners feel that the most important thing they can do is listen.   We listen to what you want, can sense a couple’s or parents’ uncertainty, can feel what kind of pressures they are facing and learn by the expression in their faces that they have found that "just right" dress, venue, photographer, etc.  

~  A Wedding Planner won't let me use any vendors I've found on my own or will make me work with a list of their preferred vendors.

The opposite would be true 99% of the time.   The most common type of job that a Wedding Planner is hired for is what is referred to as a "Day-of"  Coordination.  In this case, all the wedding vendors or other people filling in for those roles, have been set.  A "Day-of" Coordination usually doesn't include any research for venues or vendors but actually puts in, according to statistics,  40-80 hours of work before a wedding.  I have actually had brides call me wanting someone to coordinate just their wedding day and not hiring me because didn't think that there could possibly be that much work involved for the "Day-of" Coordination.  You might have noticed how I always put quotations marks around “Day-of“ and that is for a good reason.  There really is no such thing as Day-of like the name implies or what the bride thinks she wants.  Of all days, you don't want someone coming to your wedding and not knowing all the aspects and variations planned for the wedding.  For many of us, the part we like best about doing a "Day-of" Coordination, if finding new vendors whom we might not have met otherwise!

Brides, Grooms, Same-Sex Couples, Venues and Vendors alike, I would love to have the opportunity to speak with you about various ways Greatest of Days can help you out!  If you are a venue or a wedding vendor, we can help you as well.

If a Wedding Planner is given the chance, a wedding engagement time can be cut in half! Grooms particularly love that!

Wishing you the greatest of days!

www.greatestofdays.com

Planning and Designing Events and Weddings since 2007!

People Who Don't RSVP for a Wedding..or Any Event!

These types of people hold a very special place in my heart.  Not the nicest part.  Definitely not from the bottom of my heart!   

Do they have an idea of the agony they cause for someone planning an event.  Not only does a person planning an event have added stress when they least need it, the RSVP count or lack of is costing them money.  Yes, MONEY!  Guessing on a final guest count is costly.  Nothing pains me more than seeing a couple a week away from their wedding looking like volunteers at a call bank for a fund raising for public television.  "We were wondering if we could count on you for your support?"  Well,  kind of like that!

A tip for those planning an event!  Make sure your last table number is for those who might possibly show up but haven't sent in an RSVP!  It's only fair that they not be served in the same manner as everyone else.  They should be the last ones the DJ calls to the buffet line.  Never should anyone who DID send in an RSVP be scraping the bottom of a chafing dish!  

Enjoy Table #0 for the ______.  Trying not to say "Zero's".

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Where Did That Come From? Untold Wedding Traditions.

"Now Where Did That Come From?" 

I've promised to give tips, trends and tools for weddings and other events.  I've been thinking that maybe I should add to that list, traditions.  Isn't that really where a lot of the conflicts come in when planning a wedding?  I'm not speaking to cultural traditions though those can be huge, but at least you know where they are coming from.  I'm speaking to those traditions or mindsets that people have that show up when a bride is planning a wedding.  Odds are they can't even tell you why they are so insistent on these issues!  Here are a few.

"You should___",

"On our side of the family we do___"

"Why are you doing that?"

"What? You're not doing ____!"

"That's interesting!" (We know that means a thumbs down)

"What would your ____ think!"

These tidbits are just small sampling of the little darts that get tossed toward a bride planning a wedding.  Can you feel the pressure building?  Do you think she's going to eventually react or hold some resentment along with a smile?  More than likely.  Weddings are by far the most emotionally charged occasion considering that they are supposed to be happy.  

I hate to break it to people, but how things go through this process, might be just a glimpse into your future.  So consider it as part of a learning curve.  Chances are things will calm down until the next major step comes along.  In your younger years as you enter marriage, you just have to expect the next round.  Oh, that could be so pleasant, too.

"When are you going to have kids?"

"You're only having one?"

"You've got a ___ when are you going to try for a ___?"

"You're going to have how many?!" 

I would suggest rather than swallowing a bitter pill, go for the best medicine ever made and make sure you get addicted to it!  It is that wonderful medicine called laughter!  Things get better!  No one pressures you that much to retire or break a hip.  So look on the bright side!

Wishing you the greatest of days!

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The 6th largest Wedding Vendors networking group in the world through Meetup.com.

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