Weddings with Rocks, Roses, Sand, Wine Boxes, Brooms and Cording!

In Washington State there are only two statements that have to be included in wedding ceremonies to make the marriage legal as long as the person marrying them is qualified to perform the ceremony.  The "Do you take" and "Do you take" statements are to prove that neither person is entering the marriage under duress.  The other required statement is simply with them being declared as husband and wife, husband and husband or wife and wife, spouses for life, whatever the case may be.  If these two statements are not recited or duplicated in some manner, Washington State technically, does not recognize the marriage.

Seldom does anyone want a ceremony with only the two required phrases.  At the minimum there are the so-called love, honor, cherish vows and the inclusion of some kind of ring ceremony.  Beyond that, is where the uniqueness that most couples crave comes into play for their own weddings.  So let's talk a bit about how sand, rocks, candles, wine boxes, roses, oathing stones, brooms, and cording accomplish that for a wedding ceremony.  Keep in mind that these are just starting points and that many couples add personalization to personalization!  People often enjoy borrowing customs from other cultures.  As a wedding officiant, this keeps things very interesting!

      

The Sand Ceremony

The Sand Ceremony involves at least two colors of sand that are usually placed in two glass containers and poured together by a couple or two or more family members into one container signifying that two lives or two families being blended together can never be separated.  

The Rock Ceremony

The Rock Ceremony is unique and includes guest participation.  For example, there would be a rock set on every chair and the guests hold the rock in their hands and make a wish for the happiness of the bride and groom and their life together.  The guests then place their "wish" into a container.  I've seen the bride and groom place the first rocks in the bottom of a box on which they've written faith, hope and love on them representing a good foundation and all the others wishes built upon that.  I suggested this type of ceremony for one couple whose wedding was outdoors and they hadn't thought about the consequences of having programs on each chair.  Obviously, they would not stay on the chairs and needed a paperweight!  It took on a very special meaning because for generations the bride's family had a cabin on Flathead Lake.  That lake is known for the stones there that are flat.  A family member delivered enough rocks from their cabin to be used for the ceremony.  

The Unity Candle Ceremony

This is the ceremony that most people are familiar with, but is not used as often because of most venues banning the use of candles.  Two candles are lit and are either used by the couple getting married or perhaps both of the couple's mothers who then light a single candle signifying the uniting of two families.  

The Wine Box Ceremony

The Wine Box Ceremony has at least a couple of variations as far as its purpose.  The couple will write a letter describing their love for their future spouse and during the ceremony, each will place their letter  into the wine box which has already had a bottle of wine placed in it.  Here's where the purposes can vary.  Some couples open the box on their first anniversary and read the letters to each other and celebrate with a glass of wine.  Other couples will save it for their first fight and read the letters to remind themselves of their love for each other and again relax with a bottle of wine.

The Rose Ceremony

The Rose Ceremony is one that can be used in a variety of ways, but the most traditional rose ceremony involves the bride and groom taking a rose during the ceremony and giving it to their now mother-in-law.  Again, it is a symbol of blending two families.

The Oathing Stone Ceremony

The Oathing Stone ceremony originates from Celtic tradition.  A bride and groom would place their hands on a large stone often near a river which would be considered a connection to their ancestors. They would sometimes etch their names in the stone.  This is also how carving initials in trees began.  Today, couples can buy a stone with their initials carved into it.  At their wedding ceremony they both hold together in their hands the stone while the vows are being read.  This would be difficult with vows they had written rather than listening to and responding with short phrases during a ceremony.

The Broomstick Ceremony

The Broomstick ceremony has its origins in parts of Africa.  Over many centuries, the significance of the broom changed in meaning.  However, it was one tradition that survived during slavery.  That in itself made the broom ceremony one which became more of a bad reminder of that era.  After Alex Haley's book and movie Roots, were was made famous in the 1970's, the interest in this tradition was rekindled.  It was and is also common in ancient and modern Celtic wedding ceremonies.  At a wedding, after the couple has been pronounced as a married couple, they both jump over the broom at the same time.  Now it represents the beginning of a new life together.  Ancient African meanings were not so charming in that whomever jumped over the broom the highest was to be the "ruler" of the household.  (I would have said, "Ladies, practice jumping...really high!")

The Handfasting Ceremony

The Handfasting Ceremony in another tradition from the Celtics.  Again there are many variations of this type of ceremony.  A cord or ribbon is used to bind together a couple's hands with the cord or ribbon binding wrapped once more over their hands for each vow that is recited.  This is literally where the expression "tying the knot" originated.

I could go into much more detail on the blending of cultures in wedding ceremonies, but that will have to wait until another time.  Including one of our funniest wedding officiating stories ever! 💝

As always, 

Wishing you the greatest of days!

Do You Know Your Bride Type?

Let's shed a light on it!

Headlight

1.  Do you feel like a deer in the headlights?  Let's change that to dear in the headlights even though I think deer are very cute and sweet, too.  Maybe you feel blinded by fear or are paralyzed with indecision.  Maybe you have been stopped in your tracks by the bombardment of unwanted advice. Maybe you would just like to say "Beam me up Scotty!"

Spotlight

2.  Do you love all of the attention to be set on you?  You want nothing more than to be a prima donna, belle of the ball and it's all about you!  You are willing to push everyone aside so you can make your grand entrance during the whole planning process as well as the wedding.

Laser Beam

3.  Are you ultra focused and you know exactly what you want and you are afraid to let anyone help you?  Maybe you know exactly what you want and are blinded by the lack of a limitless budget.  You might even be doing some damage being so focused that you refuse to listen to suggestions to guide you away from costly mistakes.

Searchlight

4.  Do you feel like you need to find out who's going to get you?  Do you feel that everyone is going to rip you off?  Are you wondering where you will find the vendors that make you comfortable, match your style and fit your budget.  Maybe it feels like that there is no one out there who "gets" your vision.

Mood light 

5.  Do you want your wedding to ooze with ambience, romance and glistening light and sparkles everywhere?  You can never have enough bling.

Let's shine a light on why all of this matters!

Okay!  Why is all of this important for a wedding planner to know?  We need to know who we should suggest for vendors who get you!  I guess you could say we need to be able to find your "Vendor Type" not just find a vendor in any particular vendor category and not just someone who could do the job. Our goal is to match ideal vendors with ideal clients.  That is exactly why we like to know many vendors and stay from preferred vendor lists.

Bridal emergencies! This was a first!

Our tagline is "Creating Memories to Bring a Smile to Your Face for Years to Come!"  A few years ago, this was a situation I found myself in 10 minutes before a ceremony was to start.  The Maid of Honor came to me with a look of desperation on her face.  Immediately, I went into caaaaaalllllmmm mode and listened with an open mind!  She said, "She (the bride) says she needs us to bring her bucket.  She has to pee really bad!"  My first thought was, "This highly educated, refined woman?"  Expect anything on a wedding day!  But this was a first!!  The problem was, if the bride left the dressing area, everyone including the groom would be able to see her.  She wanted to surprise her groom!  Here's a secret and a view into the method to my madness!  Before I leave the house to prepare for a wedding or event, I go through my house looking for anything that might possibly come in handy other than what I have in my bridal fashion emergency kit of 600 items!  There's really not much rhyme or reason to it, I just do it!  This time I saw and grabbed a very large piece of fabric I had bought and eventually made drapes from.  It had beautiful creamy white fabric with a silver thread background with a very pale blue brocade design of a flower basket.  Best of all it was 85" wide!  That could come in handy for something. I told the maid of honor to get all of the bridesmaids prepared to hold up this piece of fabric, first taking a corner and then picking up the slack at even intervals around the fabric and hold their hands high!  What we did was encircle the bride so that she was hidden and we took the craziest 15'-20' journey from an area that was only pipe and drape over to the restroom.   Obviously we were all in a little bit of a daze and after the bride emerged from her fabric cocoon and was in the restroom, we realized that we were still holding the fabric up high in the air!  I asked, "Would anyone like to go in there and see if she is okay or could use some help?"  Preferably a Maid or Honor or a Bridesmaid! Long story short, we made it back to the dressing area, everyone was composed, a bride was much more comfortable and the wedding started on time!   Later that evening she handed my card to someone and said, "Everyone should have a Wedding Coordinator!" Wishing you the... You can reach Greatest of Days through Facebook Twitter LinkedIn Greatest of Days Newsletter (Wedding & Event Dialogue)