Venue Event Managers and Hiring Your Own Wedding Coordinator. Now, That is a Winning Team!

Maybe you have heard a bride say, “The Wedding Coordinator at the hotel is taking care of everything so I don’t need a Wedding Coordinator!”  These hard-working people who I will refer to as Event Managers, do a wonderful job of helping you plan the event, but on the day of the wedding, they cannot be there for you every minute of your wedding reception.  They will be looking at aspects of your reception from a somewhat different perspective than a Wedding Coordinator.  The Event Manager is going to be busy making sure that the venue staff are on target as to what they are supposed to do.  This person is a busy person and can be frequently called away to take care of another problem that might arise at the venue.  They have to take care of problems related to the venue itself because their regular job goes on.  

More often than not, I hear from venue and hotel event managers that they are relieved when a bride has hired a Wedding Coordinator and will often ask a bride if they have hired a coordinator.  That might come across as just the opposite of what you were expecting!  So why is this the case?  They like knowing that there is someone there who can be available for the bride at all times and a Wedding Coordinator will know who to talk to if problems arise.  For myself, I always get acquainted on some level with all the people involved with your wedding.  This is especially true with a Full-Planning Package and on a smaller scale with a Day-of Coordination Package.  I make sure that everyone you have hired as well as your wedding party are on the same page and has a clear picture of who is to be where and when.  If any changes come up, you don’t need to make all the phone calls, I do that.  If you want the DJ to turn the music down a little bit, I can relay that request for you. If you want the DJ to make an additional announcement, I will relay that on to the DJ.  Perhaps you want the DJ to be able to have a meal since he or she is going to be there for several hours, I can ask him or her what they would like to eat and at least bring them some food if that is what they want or need.  Individual vendors have their own opinion on the food issue.

Your guests will soon figure out that you have a Wedding Coordinator, and they feel that they have someone to talk to if they have a question or concern.  I personally love this part of my job and do not consider it a nuisance at all!  These are the people who are special to you and I remember that constantly.  At your wedding I become concerned for them as if they were my own friends and family.  I want them to be comfortable and have a liaison for them as well regarding the venue or anything else.  You can tell me ahead of time what or who you want me to pay some extra attention to.  I find that grandmothers really like to be doted on little bit.  There have been some cases where they have lost a spouse and it can be a day filled with so many mixed emotions for them.  They will often feel better if someone makes them feel special with a little hug or a bit of laughter.  Some people can feel very alone in a crowd and I can make sure you have something built into the whole plan to help those individuals out.  That’s another topic that I could dedicate a whole blog to that I refer to as the 6^th sense called Quiet!  These people need to have a space to escape to at the venue where they can enjoy your wedding day, but away from the crowd without looking like they are standoffish.  

Venue Event Managers do a great job of making sure that everything looks the way you want it to, and that the food is as it should be.  A Wedding Coordinator will be looking at these things, too, but a Wedding Coordinator will be continually looking for expressions on your face that will look like you have a concern.  If you and your groom are dancing and your faces are dripping with sweat, I doubt that the Event Manager is going to be able to bring a water bottle to you along with a cloth to dab the sweat away from your face and ask how you doing.  

You might have no way of knowing at some venues if you are overpaying for something, or if there are questions you could ask that could make a big difference in the outcome regarding expenses of your wedding reception.  If you use a Wedding Coordinator you might even get a discount on your total reception costs.  Did you know that many venues will give a coordinator a percentage of the total event costs if a Wedding Coordinator has brought a client to them?  The same holds true for the other vendors involved with your wedding.  This is because they value those who bring them business.  It is advertising that they don’t have to do.  In most cases, a Wedding Coordinator will have a majority if not all of that savings passed along to you. 

 As Wedding Coordinators, we know a little bit of “Venue Speak”.   I let clients know that the word provide at a venue does not necessarily mean free!  Not that any particular request should be free, but are you aware of how much that extra something might cost you?  Sometimes these little extras might not come into your mind until the day of your wedding and you are not thinking of the costs at that moment.  Hopefully, a Wedding Coordinator will have thought of these details ahead of time so you don’t run into this situation.  

A Wedding Coordinator will have your reception on a timeline down to as little as every 5 minutes if need be and can help assure that you aren’t worrying about paying for an extra hour for the photographer, videographer, DJ or limo driver due to things not being on schedule.  We know where to build in cushions of time to allow for a few little surprises, but you as a bride will not have to be worrying about it.  However, if a bride and groom or their parents or say a sibling’s flight is delayed and they are a couple hours late causing an extreme unexpected delay, it might be up to the vendors to decide  how to handle their own situation.

There are at least two things that I think all Wedding Coordinators have in common.  They love people and they enjoy helping a bride and groom and their loved ones.  I guess I could add one more thing they have in common.  A minimum of one pair of comfortable shoes!

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

Event Planners Can Save You Money and Sometimes the Day!

As an event planner the biggest myth that I try to dispel is that we are only "for the rich people".  In reality, if you want to save money in the process of planning for your wedding, it's a good idea to hire an event planner!  We can get discounts that we in turn pass on to our clients with very few exceptions.  In my case, the only time I might keep some of that discount is when I have less than three months notice to plan a wedding or if the guest list is over 250, depending on the time of the year.  These discounts can range from 5%-20% on average.  When you think of how many vendors it takes for a wedding, that can be a lot of savings!

We save you more than money.  The obvious things that come to mind are time and stress.

Sometimes what you don't know can truly hurt you, if you are not lucky.  One bride that I was hired by later on in the planning process as a one-day coordinator, had chosen a venue that had chairs that were black.  They felt very strongly due to cultural considerations, that they didn't want the color black to be in their wedding.  She had ordered chair covers and sashes to the tune of over $600.  When I did a review of the venue, I knew from looking at the chairs that it would be a rare day that you would find a chair cover to fit those chairs!  If you want to think of an equivalent picture, think about trying on a pair of jeans several sizes smaller than what you fit into now!  The chair covers that had been ordered didn't even go half way down the back of the chair!  The solution ended up being renting wooden chairs that had seat cushions to match one of the wedding colors.  The best part?  They were less expensive than chair covers and sashes, and she was very fortunate that the chair cover vendor returned her money!  If not, imagine that much money going down the drain!  The worst part would've been, in this situation, that the black chairs would not have been covered.  In some cultures the color black is strictly for times of mourning or thought to bring back luck.

Once upon a time "Michael" and "Michelle" got married.

Fictional characters:  “Michael and Michelle” had sweet dreams and nightmares about their wedding. 

Their dreams as interpreted by their guests:

Scenario 1: With a Wedding Planner

vs.

Scenario 2: Without a Wedding Planner

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Did you see that? How sweet was that!” 

vs.

“No, I was helping with the food! What are you talking about?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I heard that it only cost $15 for the COMPLETE prime rib dinner! Everything! I have to find out who their caterer is!”

vs.

“If Aunt Mary brought the food, I would not be eating it! The last wedding she cooked the food for, I got food poisoning!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“A good DJ Makes all the difference! Really reading the crowd very well and everyone is having such a great time! I don't normally dance at weddings, but that was fun!”

vs.

“Why on earth did they let his cousin use an I-Pod!” Where did he go anyway? No!! He’s not at the bar!!  That's what he really came for!  All the music sounds the same!  Some variety would be nice!  I think I'll leave a little earlier than I had intended.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What a beautiful cake?”

vs.

“Oh no! Here’s the cake! Did anyone remember a table to set it on?  Where is…..who is...WHAT?" 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“This is nice. No one is getting drunk or obnoxious! That wine was really good though. They hired a bartender”.

vs. 

Oh no! Look at Michael! Someone let him have a few too many! Poor Michelle! What a memory of her wedding day! Too bad! 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“The flowers are gorgeous! They used the same florist I used! She actually made a free bouquet for me to toss, just like they did for Michelle, today!” 

vs.

“We ordered the flowers for my wedding online, but they were starting to wilt because they got here too early.  We had to get some flowers from the store, but they weren't the color that I wanted”.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“There wasn’t enough space to hang everyone’s coat at this venue, but the Wedding Planner found a company that provides a secured check-in for coats. They were also given suggestions on rental options”.

vs.

”Where do we put our coats? Oh well! Guess I'll just hang on to it or wear it even though it's really hot in here". 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I’m so glad that they didn’t elope. They felt better after they talked to a Wedding Planner who made everything easier for them.”

vs.

"That's right!  They were talking about Vegas!  I wouldn't have been able to attend their wedding with the way things are at work right now.  I cannot take any time off.  I hate flying anyway!  If I hate packing for a trip, imagine packing for a wedding!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“This is the first wedding I’ve been to where everything has been on time! That’s what happens when you have a wedding planner working with you from day one!”

vs.

Things are running way behind schedule! They’re going to have to pay extra for the photographer to stay longer as well as additional time for the limo driver. It took so long for everyone to get their food.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“It’s so peaceful here! The Wedding Coordinator made sure there weren’t going to be any conflicting activities to interfere with the wedding.

vs.

“Isn’t that terrible that they have a baseball tournament going on next door and all that noise during the wedding!  Who would have thought that the team would be in the playoffs?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Janis Flagg, Owner
Greatest of Days
Event Planning and Design
Wedding Officiating
http://www.greatestofdays.com/
jan@greatestofdays.com
"Creating Memories to Bring a Smile to Your Face for Years to Come!"
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http://www.greatestofdaysweddingsandevents.blogspot.com/

There are no guarantees that a wedding will go perfectly without any flaws, but having professionals in charge for your wedding, reduces that risk tremendously!

We're Entering "Engagement Season!" How to Handle the Onslaught of Opinions or Suggestions for Your Wedding.

Something happens when you begin to make appearances here and there with an engagement ring on your finger.  Eyes get big, people scurry up to you and say things that make you feel like you are on the top of the world.  For a little while anyway.  It’s inevitable that some of those mouths are going to utter things you probably aren’t prepared to deal with.  Here are just a few tips to help you through the tougher moments.  This might be a surprise to you, but your fiance’ might appear that he doesn’t even care!  Take heart, hang on and develop your sense of humor!  

1.  Consider the Source!  Expect that those who always give their two cent's worth, no matter what the situation is, to enter the game from the sidelines thinking that they are entering their "helpful zone!"   No need to fear!  Pretend that they are just putting money in your pocket but what they don't know is that your pocket has a hole in it!  Unless you find that their offering is of high value and you cannot let that good suggestion go, don't mend your pocket!                                                                                    

2.  Pretend You Won the Lottery!  It might seem like people are coming out of the woodwork!  Just remember that they might be reminiscing or dreaming of their own wedding or someone else's wedding rather than really trying to give you advice.  Ears and eyes seem to open when we hear the word wedding.  It seems to be natural for us as women.  Try to recall when you heard that someone was engaged and how you probably had something to say, but didn't really mean anything by it.  Surround yourself as much as possible with people who are looking out for your well-being who will be honest with you and understand and believe in your vision for your wedding.                                                                                                                
3.  Come up with a catch phrase to shift everyone into the neutral gear.  Smile your brightest smile! Tell them nicely that you have been receiving so many wonderful tips from everyone from Topic A to Topic Z, and you feel like it could take 100 years to digest everyone's great ideas and you wish you only had the time!  Maybe they will feel sorry for you and understand your plight a little bit.  All you need is a moment to change the subject and ask what's been happening with them lately.  They will undoubtedly be happy to talk about themselves.                                                                          

4.  Difference between those who want to help and those who really will help!  Beware! Help might actually mean "control".  Most of your friends and family truly want to help or show their support.  The secret is to make them feel appreciated.  Tell them thank you, but you're still just trying to get used to the fact that you're engaged and ask if they don't mind a telephone call at 2:00 AM!  See what reaction you get!  Express the fact that you feel fortunate to have so many people who are willing to be on your team.  If it helps, just think how horrible it would feel if no one cared or seemed excited to hear of your engagement.  That's a topic for another time!  Beware of those who are too subtle or too brazen.    

5.  Your fiance' seems so oblivious to everything!  Well, you might just be right!  There are some things you can do to help.  In general terms, guys don't like details or conflict.  Especially emotional conflict!  If they seem indifferent, it's often that they hate to see you in pain.  If you are marrying your soul mate, you know that he will be the first to defend you when the chips are down.  If he feels that he doesn't know the answer, he'd probably prefer to not hear the question.  Weddings, I can assure you, are not what he has been planning in great detail in his mind since he was three years old!  There is hope and help for you!  Get him involved in the things that you know he is looking forward to the most.  Honeymoon sound like a good place to start?  He will be so proud of himself for putting together the most perfect honeymoon!  Let him choose the most ridiculous form of transportation in which to leave your reception if that's what he likes, unless it's a horse-drawn carriage and you are deathly afraid of horses!  He should know something like that already!  Marriage is all about compromise, commitment and give and take.  Let him pick the tuxes and let him know that the tux shop should be nice and show him this type, that color and style for a particular theme.  He'll want guidelines, just don't call them that!  Make it look like the tux shop is in the place of responsibility to him as a client.  They really are, but if you make your fiance' feel like he is the man of the hour and is the most discerning person for this absolutely number one, crucial and astonishing mission into outer space, his face will be beaming! Make him feel important "now and then", but not overwhelmed.  Let him hire a  professional DJ who is highly-recommended.  Consider yourself lucky, if you can get him to do much more than all of this.  Try one more thing...officiant search!  That's something he'll probably realize the importance of!  Obviously, you should both show up when that appointment is set!!

Enjoy!
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Wishing You the Greatest of Days!