We were hoping to get married on this date, but ...

It makes me sad when I hear of a couple who has wanted to get married on a certain date but have had to postpone their wedding, sometimes more than once.  Often it's due to the lack of money or an unfortunate set of circumstances due to changes in their employment status, health or family situations.  It makes me wish I could have spoken with them to see if there would have been some way to help them.  I can't help but wonder if they'd had some tips to cut down the expenses or solutions for saving time, if they could have avoided postponing their wedding.  Time and money, if only they were friends at the same time!  Who hasn't experienced the lack of one or both at some point?  Very few people.

I just read a recent statistic that the average bride-to-be spends 30.4 hours per week planning her wedding.  Does that sound too much like a full-time job to you?  I know right now that this person has no spare time and probably didn't feel like she had spare time even before she started planning her wedding.  She might not be aware of how much of her life she could get back by hiring a Wedding Planner.  If that same bride was to spend 30.4 hours with a Wedding Planner, I am certain that instead of feeling tired and overwhelmed, she would feel a sense of relief and a large portion of her planning would be out of the way. 

Perhaps you ask, aren't Wedding Planners really expensive?  As Wedding Planners, vendors give us discounts because they appreciate us bringing business to them.  I pass these discounts directly to the client.  Most of my discounts range from 5%-20%.  That adds up.  I won't recommend a vendor merely on discounts, however.  I think it's most important that your personalities and visions are a good match.  I love it if I end up saving a client more money than I cost them!  This is before you add in the value of a Wedding Planner's experience and reduced stress that comes with hiring a Wedding Planner.  We are up on trends, on the lookout for problems, and listening to everything you want.  We also act as a liaison or an advocate for you with a vendor, venue or even a family member or friend involved with the wedding.  We definitely can reduce time spent running around, searching on the internet or getting so many people involved in your wedding planning process that your head begins to spin.  

I like to think that we can shorten an engagement period.  Perhaps even by months.  Recently, I had the opportunity to have a video made for my business (one more thing I have to add to my website, but it's on my Facebook page!).  I thought that the best thing I could do was to show how I can coordinate vendors for a wedding.  Within 24 hours I had 14 vendors who wanted to participate, with just a promise of lunch and mentioning their business on the video.  We had 5 days to prepare for a shoot that would last for 2 hours.  The vendors that came forward are quality vendors and are very nice people who are passionate about their professions.  This is just an example of how nice it is to know so many people who would be just as eager to serve a client.

If you don't like long engagements, or you see someone struggling during the planning of their wedding, you might consider an inexpensive consultation with a Wedding Planner.  That might even be a nice engagement gift to give to a friend, or daughter or other family member!

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

For more wedding tips, visit my Facebook page, Greatest of Days.

Bargain Bridal and Bridesmaid's Dresses!

Two years ago I had a bride who had an extremely tight budget and I really wanted to make her dream wedding come true.  She wanted her bridesmaids to wear sage green dresses.  This is when the bargain shopper in me comes alive!  I visited two Nordstrom's Racks over a month's time in the Puget Sound area and found beautiful dresses that were all in the same color and style.  The trick is to match the style numbers on the tags sew into the dresses and to shop often.  The great part was that I found the dresses in every size that we needed for her bridesmaids from sizes 10 on up to 18W.  No, the greatest part was that they only cost $25.00 each and in no way did they look hideous!  We were even able to purchase an extra one in case they would have to have a larger size later on.  She wanted her matron of honor to wear something different than her bridesmaids that she would be comfortable in because she was self-conscious of being very thin.  We found a style that complimented the other dresses nicely, and her matron of honor felt confident that she looked nice in the dress.  Her dress cost $35.00.  So we got 4 dresses for $110.00

The bride did not want to wear a white dress and wanted something unique and found a beautiful satin antique gold skirt with a train and top at a second-hand dress shop.  The top was too tight, but she got such a good deal on the skirt that it was worth purchasing.  We went to one fabric store and found the perfect fabric in a matching color with accents of gold thread in the fabric.  We took that fabric to a dressmaker and the bride got a beautiful top made that laced up in the back.  Her skirt and custom top came to a total of just under $200.00.  This bride needed a larger size which would have been difficult to find at an average bridal shop.  She looked radiant on her wedding day and no one would have guessed she got such good bargains!  The bride and her bridal party were very pleased with their dresses for a grand total of $310.00.

Bargains are to be had if you are willing to shop using unusual methods.  With a slow economy and the fact that people are concerned about the environment, recycling dresses is very popular. A few years ago I noticed that brides would buy more than one wedding dress just in case they changed their mind.  Not many brides have that kind of money now!  There are many ways to find dresses that haven't even been worn.

You can email me through my website if you would like to learn more about ways to find dresses at bargain prices that look fabulous.  Another tip!  Sometimes it is actually less expensive to have someone design and make your dress than buying a dress at a bridal store!  I'm not suggesting that you avoid shopping at bridal stores because I know of some smaller shops that have fabulous prices on custom gowns.  The simple fact is that there are more options that brides are unaware of when it comes to finding that perfect wedding dress or bridesmaids' dresses.

(Above)  One of the $25.00 dresses.

(Below) the $35.00 dress

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

www.greatestofdays.com

jan@greatestofdays.com

What Is the Role of A Wedding Coordinator?

Unlike what you might see on the TV shows and movies about Wedding Coordinators, our job is not as glamorous as one might imagine.  It is exciting, however, and an honor that we get to spend more time with a bride than any other vendor for her wedding.  We do what we do because we are passionate about helping a bride and groom, their families and friends so that everyone can truly enjoy their wedding day rather than work during that special day.  It is impossible in one blog entry to go into every detail of what the role of a Wedding Coordinator is, but I will try to at least give you a glimpse.

Most Wedding Coordinators will offer three basic variations of planning packages with a few more that are a blending of those basic packages.  This is just to give you a picture of what a Wedding Coordinator can do for a client and everyone involved in her wedding.

The first level of of planning packages is more than likely just to help a bride in choosing vendors/venues in which the Coordinator will offer a selection of 3 or so for a set price per vendor category search.

The second package is probably along the lines of a Day-of-Coordination (DOC).  These packages are popular when a bride has chosen the vast majority of her vendors, except for maybe a couple of them.  This bride feels that she needs some help pulling everything together, is somewhat overwhelmed thinking about her wedding day and has concerns about how everything is going to come together on her wedding day.  Unlike it sounds, a Day-of-Coordination involves on average 30-80 hours of work, not just showing up on the wedding day!  Some planners include directing the rehearsal with this and others do not.  I visit the venue as well as take a quick glance at the contracts from vendors primarily to look for a potential problems.  It cannot be considered a legal review.  From information we have gathered from them, we sometimes have to be the bearer of bad news, but that's better than on your wedding day not being able to do half of what you had planned on for decorating, just as an example.

The third basic package would be a Full Coordination in which the Coordinator helps a client choose a vast majority of her vendors.  It could even include assistance in choosing the wedding gown, attire for the bridal party, reviewing a venue, meeting together with the bride and different vendors and anyone who might be closely working with the bride.   Coordinators generally offer in this type of package to direct the rehearsal.  A Coordinator will be there specifically for the bride and groom on the day of the wedding and act as a liaison for them and their guests with any vendor and the venue.

With the two previous planning packages mentioned, a Coordinator will work closely with all of the vendors and a bride to develop a timeline for the entire wedding day so that things stay on schedule.  This can save a bride a lot of money because if you have to pay for an extra hour for a DJ or a limousine that's sitting outside the building because things are behind schedule those extra dollars can be significant.  If a venue charges you extra for an additional hour, pretty soon you could have hundreds of dollars added to your venue bill.

Sometimes it's the little things that make a difference when there is a Coordinator on the scene.  We realize that your guests are the most important people in your life and will go out of our way to make sure everyone is comfortable.  If you have a grandmother going through a particularly hard time who you think could use a hug, we'll be glad to get acquainted and give her an extra smile and a hug.  At one wedding that I accompanied my husband to that he was officiating, the mother of the bride said that they wouldn't need me to bring a bridal emergency kit but I always do anyway.  Perhaps she was thinking it would cost money, but I wouldn't do that because I thinks it's just good customer service.  Within five minutes of arriving, I was helping a bridesmaid get makeup off of her dress and also making repairs to the bride's dress so that the bustle would stay in place.  Again, it's the little things that make your day easier.  Each Coordinator will have his or her own special ways of dealing with everything to set their client at ease.

Back to the unglamorous part of being a Wedding Coordinator, we handle other types of emergencies or situations that come up.  Since are usually the first to arrive on the day of the wedding and the last to leave, we make those discoveries that have appeared overnight.  Imagine surprise graffiti, someone took off with the garbage cans, the city employee didn't unlock the restroom doors as promised and so forth.  Think of Murphy's Law.  We do our best to make you unaware that Murphy ever showed up!  We like to take care of problems in such a way that you might not even know that there was a problem.

One more thing!  When do you think we hear the statement from a bride or her family that they wish they had hired a coordinator?  It is just before a wedding and right after a wedding!  By hiring a Coordinator early on you can save yourself a lot of stress, save money through discounts we can pass on to you, and save some relationships.  Yes the latter is sad but true when nerves get raw,  emotions run high, and when anyone in particular feels overworked or even exhausted from someone constantly changing their mind.

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

Brides First! The Honest Truth Might Surprise You!

 When I hear generalizations about what brides want for their weddings, it almost makes me cringe.  A wedding is not something that is dished up from a menu.  First off, who I am to know what a bride wants until I have spoken with her and perhaps her family at some length?  That is the most important part in my mind when offering to plan a wedding.  Listening!

I have to laugh when someone says, "Doesn't a bride always choose her (fill in the vendor) first?  A photographer can think she chooses a photographer, a bakery thinks she chooses her cake first, a venue manager will think that it is a venue.  People will also ask me if I have a preferred vendor for this or for that particular service.  I tell them, "No".  The client is so important and I don't want to match a bride up with a vendor that I think she will be uncomfortable with.  People have actually said to me, "Brides don't really care about decorations that much, or this or that, do they?"  To one bride it won't be important, but to another bride it might mean everything.  I figure it's my job to be led as well as to lead.

Planning a wedding is an emotional experience on many levels.   When a bride is consulting with her vendors, I want a bride to feel like she is walking through the door of her own home, wearing an old pair of comfortable shoes and talking to a good friend who knows what she's going to say next but listens as if they can read her mind.  I must explain further, I would never say that a vendor is purposely going to make anyone uncomfortable.  I think I happen to know some of the most amazing vendors who do a wonderful job and I have the greatest respect for them.  But, I'd compare it to thinking back to school and who was your favorite teacher.  There was something about that teacher that touched your heart, made you feel important or inspired you.  That's what I feel it should be like with various vendors and that doesn't happen accidentally.  

A bride will know when she is comfortable with a vendor or not, but why put her through unnecessary stress when you've gotten to know her likes and dislikes first?  If I sense that she is intimidated by opinionated people and would crawl into her shell and end up settling for something she didn't like, I'd feel terrible.  If she is bursting with ideas, I know she's going to want to talk to someone who will validate her ideas and get excited along with her and share her vision.  If she is so nervous about absolutely everything, then I want to put her in the hands of someone who is comforting and has no problem being patient and understanding and be willing to do a little hand-holding.  Again, I must say that most vendors are passionate about what they do and go out of their way to make a bride feel comfortable, but not all personalities match.

Would I myself ever turn a bride down?  When we first started our business, I will admit that I didn't feel like I could turn anyone away, and it's still difficult at times because I genuinely am a people person.  Just like my Dad!   A bride doesn't want to be treated with disrespect and neither do I.  I used to  reschedule an appointment  when a bride missed her first and second scheduled consultations.  Now I don't.  If a second scheduled initial consultation is missed, I figure that it just isn't meant to be.   I will of course call to make sure she is okay and that nothing happened to her.   I know that my time is valuable and I do not want to risk having this be a pattern for the next year or so.    

Those of us in the wedding profession wouldn't be in it if we didn't absolutely love it.  Sometimes that is the best of it and the worst of it!

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

Things You Should Know When Searching for a Venue!

I have at least 50 questions in my mind when I research venues.   I don't have a written list any more.  It's in my head!  I may only ask ten or more of these questions, but the other questions are being answered just from my walking around a venue.

I would say that the number one thing you need to know to prevent surprises down the road when it comes to venues, is to truly identify what the word provide means in the venue's terms.  Provide does not and I repeat, does not always mean free.  They can provide a million things, but you might pay for the extra chair, table, or an unexpected amount of money for anything you might consider to be very simple.  Sometimes these lists of charges might feel like you are looking at a bill from a hospital.  If you are prepared you won't be saying, "It cost how much for that?!"  I cannot tell you how many times I've heard from a client, "I wouldn't have ever thought of that!"  Those are the very same things that can really cause stress when it gets closer to your wedding.  It's not what you know but what you don't know that can hurt you.

I won't go into all of my questions that are going through my mind on a tour of a venue.  Suffice it to say that every venue is different.  If I had a dollar for every time I heard a venue ask, "If you can think of anything we should do, please tell me".  I am happy to because that helps their clients.

What are some of the most obvious things you might want to know about when you are venue searching?  Listed below are just few things that come to mind.  You might actually have things that are more of a concern to you that are not listed here.

1.  I always want to know if a venue is handicapped accessible because sometimes they are not. Don't assume that because your guests, young or old, are in good physical shape that you don't need to take this into consideration.  Your wedding is probably several months away.  Anyone can break a leg or injure a knee and end up using crutches.  Not to be negative here, but being prepared is what will give you peace of mind.  We've heard enough horror stories!

2.  Do they provide a licensed bartender for your wedding or event? If so, what is involved on your part?

3.  Do they allow candles?  Most do not!

4.  What are their rules for decorating?  This is big issue!  Get ready to hear them say that they do not allow tape, nails, tacks, glue, etc.  This can destroy a lot of what you might have visualized your wedding and reception to look like.

5.  How much time will you have to decorate?  Be sure to realize that two hours is nothing when you are dealing with decorating a venue.  This isn't the Thanksgiving dinner table you are used to decorating.

6.  A big thing I look for is parking. This could make the difference between your guests arriving on time or not.

7.  Do they have a shuttle service arrangement with local hotels?

8.  Do they have linens in other colors than just white that you won't have to pay extra for to compliment the colors of your wedding?

9.  If you hear that they have a good sound system, please don't assume it will be good for a wedding reception.  A professional DJ is worth his or her weight in gold!  The house sound systems quite frankly frighten me and I find them to be unreliable all too often.

10.  If you hear "we let you bring in your own food" be sure to clarify that!  They might really mean they allow licensed caterers from outside of their venue provide the food.  It doesn't necessarily mean you can cook your own food and bring it to the venue.

The more you know about your venue, the greater your wedding day will be!  It's easy to get into that mode of hearing what you want to hear, but it's better to step back and take a deep breath and really examine things closely.

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

10-10-2010. What is in a wedding day?

The 2010 wedding season will be more popular in October than normal. That is because of the novelty of 10-10-10 and it helps that that day falls on a Sunday.  I've found it interesting that some brides and grooms who have chosen this date for their wedding, are surprised that they find themselves in such large company.  It makes sense because it's just fun to have an unusual date for a major moment in one's life.  The groom might pitch in with, "I wanted to have a day that I would remember!"  I wonder if it is similar to parents choosing a name that they are certain no one else will be using to name a child.  How is it that these names end up being so popular and their child is one of many with the same name in a classroom a few years later?  I'm sure that someone has an answer to this phenomenon, but at the moment I don't really know.

It's not uncommon to find that people think that a long weekend is a good time to get married especially for those who have to travel.  But is it? Traffic is more congested from everyone else being on the road.  Airlines know when to increase prices just as the oil companies raise the price of gasoline.  I'll never forget a wedding that was delayed by 2 or more hours because of holiday traffic that the father of the bride was stuck in.  Granted, it didn't help that his car broke down or maybe it was the traffic that contributed to it breaking down!  That's not the worst part.  He was driving what was supposed to be a surprise gift for the bride and groom!  Popularity of a particular date or holiday can bring on an extra element of stress, and a better chance of your guests experiencing delays.

You want to know if your vendors are going to charge extra for their services on a holiday.  Are they going to make regular deliveries on a particular day and are they going to have less experienced help performing the tasks.  These may be things that you are willing to work with but it doesn't hurt to find out what you are in for.

We want our wedding days to go perfectly.  But it is best to remember that some things you can control, some things you cannot.  Mother nature can often render the worst storms when you are certain you've chosen your wedding day to be one with the best chances of good weather according to all the statistics.  If a bride is getting nervous, I try to gently remind her that though we want everything to go perfectly, does the average day go perfectly that has only a fraction of the details and emotions involved as their wedding day?  Probably not.  Chances are that with a lot of effort, 99% of everything will go wonderfully and no one will be the wiser to any unplanned events.  The secret is to be prepared for the most likely unexpected happenings.

No matter what the wedding date is, I find for myself that a positive attitude is a good companion to going with the flow, turning on a dime, choosing to laugh instead of scream, remembering to smile and above all, keeping a good sense of humor!  I guess I would stress one thing to brides. Sometimes those moments you would rather not live through, are the moments you are going to remember with a good laugh for years.  I threw my bouquet on the roof, but I'm still married years later!  Those years later are what your day is all about.  Planning is so important, but life happens and no one should feel guilty about that.  Keep It Simple and Steamlined!

So what is in a day?  A good mixture of everything you put into it.  By the way, next year "the day" will be 11-11-11.

Wishing you the greatest of days!

Venue Event Managers and Hiring Your Own Wedding Coordinator. Now, That is a Winning Team!

Maybe you have heard a bride say, “The Wedding Coordinator at the hotel is taking care of everything so I don’t need a Wedding Coordinator!”  These hard-working people who I will refer to as Event Managers, do a wonderful job of helping you plan the event, but on the day of the wedding, they cannot be there for you every minute of your wedding reception.  They will be looking at aspects of your reception from a somewhat different perspective than a Wedding Coordinator.  The Event Manager is going to be busy making sure that the venue staff are on target as to what they are supposed to do.  This person is a busy person and can be frequently called away to take care of another problem that might arise at the venue.  They have to take care of problems related to the venue itself because their regular job goes on.  

More often than not, I hear from venue and hotel event managers that they are relieved when a bride has hired a Wedding Coordinator and will often ask a bride if they have hired a coordinator.  That might come across as just the opposite of what you were expecting!  So why is this the case?  They like knowing that there is someone there who can be available for the bride at all times and a Wedding Coordinator will know who to talk to if problems arise.  For myself, I always get acquainted on some level with all the people involved with your wedding.  This is especially true with a Full-Planning Package and on a smaller scale with a Day-of Coordination Package.  I make sure that everyone you have hired as well as your wedding party are on the same page and has a clear picture of who is to be where and when.  If any changes come up, you don’t need to make all the phone calls, I do that.  If you want the DJ to turn the music down a little bit, I can relay that request for you. If you want the DJ to make an additional announcement, I will relay that on to the DJ.  Perhaps you want the DJ to be able to have a meal since he or she is going to be there for several hours, I can ask him or her what they would like to eat and at least bring them some food if that is what they want or need.  Individual vendors have their own opinion on the food issue.

Your guests will soon figure out that you have a Wedding Coordinator, and they feel that they have someone to talk to if they have a question or concern.  I personally love this part of my job and do not consider it a nuisance at all!  These are the people who are special to you and I remember that constantly.  At your wedding I become concerned for them as if they were my own friends and family.  I want them to be comfortable and have a liaison for them as well regarding the venue or anything else.  You can tell me ahead of time what or who you want me to pay some extra attention to.  I find that grandmothers really like to be doted on little bit.  There have been some cases where they have lost a spouse and it can be a day filled with so many mixed emotions for them.  They will often feel better if someone makes them feel special with a little hug or a bit of laughter.  Some people can feel very alone in a crowd and I can make sure you have something built into the whole plan to help those individuals out.  That’s another topic that I could dedicate a whole blog to that I refer to as the 6^th sense called Quiet!  These people need to have a space to escape to at the venue where they can enjoy your wedding day, but away from the crowd without looking like they are standoffish.  

Venue Event Managers do a great job of making sure that everything looks the way you want it to, and that the food is as it should be.  A Wedding Coordinator will be looking at these things, too, but a Wedding Coordinator will be continually looking for expressions on your face that will look like you have a concern.  If you and your groom are dancing and your faces are dripping with sweat, I doubt that the Event Manager is going to be able to bring a water bottle to you along with a cloth to dab the sweat away from your face and ask how you doing.  

You might have no way of knowing at some venues if you are overpaying for something, or if there are questions you could ask that could make a big difference in the outcome regarding expenses of your wedding reception.  If you use a Wedding Coordinator you might even get a discount on your total reception costs.  Did you know that many venues will give a coordinator a percentage of the total event costs if a Wedding Coordinator has brought a client to them?  The same holds true for the other vendors involved with your wedding.  This is because they value those who bring them business.  It is advertising that they don’t have to do.  In most cases, a Wedding Coordinator will have a majority if not all of that savings passed along to you. 

 As Wedding Coordinators, we know a little bit of “Venue Speak”.   I let clients know that the word provide at a venue does not necessarily mean free!  Not that any particular request should be free, but are you aware of how much that extra something might cost you?  Sometimes these little extras might not come into your mind until the day of your wedding and you are not thinking of the costs at that moment.  Hopefully, a Wedding Coordinator will have thought of these details ahead of time so you don’t run into this situation.  

A Wedding Coordinator will have your reception on a timeline down to as little as every 5 minutes if need be and can help assure that you aren’t worrying about paying for an extra hour for the photographer, videographer, DJ or limo driver due to things not being on schedule.  We know where to build in cushions of time to allow for a few little surprises, but you as a bride will not have to be worrying about it.  However, if a bride and groom or their parents or say a sibling’s flight is delayed and they are a couple hours late causing an extreme unexpected delay, it might be up to the vendors to decide  how to handle their own situation.

There are at least two things that I think all Wedding Coordinators have in common.  They love people and they enjoy helping a bride and groom and their loved ones.  I guess I could add one more thing they have in common.  A minimum of one pair of comfortable shoes!

Wishing you the Greatest of Days!

Event Planners Can Save You Money and Sometimes the Day!

As an event planner the biggest myth that I try to dispel is that we are only "for the rich people".  In reality, if you want to save money in the process of planning for your wedding, it's a good idea to hire an event planner!  We can get discounts that we in turn pass on to our clients with very few exceptions.  In my case, the only time I might keep some of that discount is when I have less than three months notice to plan a wedding or if the guest list is over 250, depending on the time of the year.  These discounts can range from 5%-20% on average.  When you think of how many vendors it takes for a wedding, that can be a lot of savings!

We save you more than money.  The obvious things that come to mind are time and stress.

Sometimes what you don't know can truly hurt you, if you are not lucky.  One bride that I was hired by later on in the planning process as a one-day coordinator, had chosen a venue that had chairs that were black.  They felt very strongly due to cultural considerations, that they didn't want the color black to be in their wedding.  She had ordered chair covers and sashes to the tune of over $600.  When I did a review of the venue, I knew from looking at the chairs that it would be a rare day that you would find a chair cover to fit those chairs!  If you want to think of an equivalent picture, think about trying on a pair of jeans several sizes smaller than what you fit into now!  The chair covers that had been ordered didn't even go half way down the back of the chair!  The solution ended up being renting wooden chairs that had seat cushions to match one of the wedding colors.  The best part?  They were less expensive than chair covers and sashes, and she was very fortunate that the chair cover vendor returned her money!  If not, imagine that much money going down the drain!  The worst part would've been, in this situation, that the black chairs would not have been covered.  In some cultures the color black is strictly for times of mourning or thought to bring back luck.

Once upon a time "Michael" and "Michelle" got married.

Fictional characters:  “Michael and Michelle” had sweet dreams and nightmares about their wedding. 

Their dreams as interpreted by their guests:

Scenario 1: With a Wedding Planner

vs.

Scenario 2: Without a Wedding Planner

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Did you see that? How sweet was that!” 

vs.

“No, I was helping with the food! What are you talking about?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I heard that it only cost $15 for the COMPLETE prime rib dinner! Everything! I have to find out who their caterer is!”

vs.

“If Aunt Mary brought the food, I would not be eating it! The last wedding she cooked the food for, I got food poisoning!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“A good DJ Makes all the difference! Really reading the crowd very well and everyone is having such a great time! I don't normally dance at weddings, but that was fun!”

vs.

“Why on earth did they let his cousin use an I-Pod!” Where did he go anyway? No!! He’s not at the bar!!  That's what he really came for!  All the music sounds the same!  Some variety would be nice!  I think I'll leave a little earlier than I had intended.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What a beautiful cake?”

vs.

“Oh no! Here’s the cake! Did anyone remember a table to set it on?  Where is…..who is...WHAT?" 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“This is nice. No one is getting drunk or obnoxious! That wine was really good though. They hired a bartender”.

vs. 

Oh no! Look at Michael! Someone let him have a few too many! Poor Michelle! What a memory of her wedding day! Too bad! 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“The flowers are gorgeous! They used the same florist I used! She actually made a free bouquet for me to toss, just like they did for Michelle, today!” 

vs.

“We ordered the flowers for my wedding online, but they were starting to wilt because they got here too early.  We had to get some flowers from the store, but they weren't the color that I wanted”.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“There wasn’t enough space to hang everyone’s coat at this venue, but the Wedding Planner found a company that provides a secured check-in for coats. They were also given suggestions on rental options”.

vs.

”Where do we put our coats? Oh well! Guess I'll just hang on to it or wear it even though it's really hot in here". 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I’m so glad that they didn’t elope. They felt better after they talked to a Wedding Planner who made everything easier for them.”

vs.

"That's right!  They were talking about Vegas!  I wouldn't have been able to attend their wedding with the way things are at work right now.  I cannot take any time off.  I hate flying anyway!  If I hate packing for a trip, imagine packing for a wedding!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“This is the first wedding I’ve been to where everything has been on time! That’s what happens when you have a wedding planner working with you from day one!”

vs.

Things are running way behind schedule! They’re going to have to pay extra for the photographer to stay longer as well as additional time for the limo driver. It took so long for everyone to get their food.”

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“It’s so peaceful here! The Wedding Coordinator made sure there weren’t going to be any conflicting activities to interfere with the wedding.

vs.

“Isn’t that terrible that they have a baseball tournament going on next door and all that noise during the wedding!  Who would have thought that the team would be in the playoffs?"

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Janis Flagg, Owner
Greatest of Days
Event Planning and Design
Wedding Officiating
http://www.greatestofdays.com/
jan@greatestofdays.com
"Creating Memories to Bring a Smile to Your Face for Years to Come!"
http://www.facebook.com/greatestofdays
http://www.greatestofdaysweddingsandevents.blogspot.com/

There are no guarantees that a wedding will go perfectly without any flaws, but having professionals in charge for your wedding, reduces that risk tremendously!

We're Entering "Engagement Season!" How to Handle the Onslaught of Opinions or Suggestions for Your Wedding.

Something happens when you begin to make appearances here and there with an engagement ring on your finger.  Eyes get big, people scurry up to you and say things that make you feel like you are on the top of the world.  For a little while anyway.  It’s inevitable that some of those mouths are going to utter things you probably aren’t prepared to deal with.  Here are just a few tips to help you through the tougher moments.  This might be a surprise to you, but your fiance’ might appear that he doesn’t even care!  Take heart, hang on and develop your sense of humor!  

1.  Consider the Source!  Expect that those who always give their two cent's worth, no matter what the situation is, to enter the game from the sidelines thinking that they are entering their "helpful zone!"   No need to fear!  Pretend that they are just putting money in your pocket but what they don't know is that your pocket has a hole in it!  Unless you find that their offering is of high value and you cannot let that good suggestion go, don't mend your pocket!                                                                                    

2.  Pretend You Won the Lottery!  It might seem like people are coming out of the woodwork!  Just remember that they might be reminiscing or dreaming of their own wedding or someone else's wedding rather than really trying to give you advice.  Ears and eyes seem to open when we hear the word wedding.  It seems to be natural for us as women.  Try to recall when you heard that someone was engaged and how you probably had something to say, but didn't really mean anything by it.  Surround yourself as much as possible with people who are looking out for your well-being who will be honest with you and understand and believe in your vision for your wedding.                                                                                                                
3.  Come up with a catch phrase to shift everyone into the neutral gear.  Smile your brightest smile! Tell them nicely that you have been receiving so many wonderful tips from everyone from Topic A to Topic Z, and you feel like it could take 100 years to digest everyone's great ideas and you wish you only had the time!  Maybe they will feel sorry for you and understand your plight a little bit.  All you need is a moment to change the subject and ask what's been happening with them lately.  They will undoubtedly be happy to talk about themselves.                                                                          

4.  Difference between those who want to help and those who really will help!  Beware! Help might actually mean "control".  Most of your friends and family truly want to help or show their support.  The secret is to make them feel appreciated.  Tell them thank you, but you're still just trying to get used to the fact that you're engaged and ask if they don't mind a telephone call at 2:00 AM!  See what reaction you get!  Express the fact that you feel fortunate to have so many people who are willing to be on your team.  If it helps, just think how horrible it would feel if no one cared or seemed excited to hear of your engagement.  That's a topic for another time!  Beware of those who are too subtle or too brazen.    

5.  Your fiance' seems so oblivious to everything!  Well, you might just be right!  There are some things you can do to help.  In general terms, guys don't like details or conflict.  Especially emotional conflict!  If they seem indifferent, it's often that they hate to see you in pain.  If you are marrying your soul mate, you know that he will be the first to defend you when the chips are down.  If he feels that he doesn't know the answer, he'd probably prefer to not hear the question.  Weddings, I can assure you, are not what he has been planning in great detail in his mind since he was three years old!  There is hope and help for you!  Get him involved in the things that you know he is looking forward to the most.  Honeymoon sound like a good place to start?  He will be so proud of himself for putting together the most perfect honeymoon!  Let him choose the most ridiculous form of transportation in which to leave your reception if that's what he likes, unless it's a horse-drawn carriage and you are deathly afraid of horses!  He should know something like that already!  Marriage is all about compromise, commitment and give and take.  Let him pick the tuxes and let him know that the tux shop should be nice and show him this type, that color and style for a particular theme.  He'll want guidelines, just don't call them that!  Make it look like the tux shop is in the place of responsibility to him as a client.  They really are, but if you make your fiance' feel like he is the man of the hour and is the most discerning person for this absolutely number one, crucial and astonishing mission into outer space, his face will be beaming! Make him feel important "now and then", but not overwhelmed.  Let him hire a  professional DJ who is highly-recommended.  Consider yourself lucky, if you can get him to do much more than all of this.  Try one more thing...officiant search!  That's something he'll probably realize the importance of!  Obviously, you should both show up when that appointment is set!!

Enjoy!
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Wishing You the Greatest of Days!